Fellow players, what’s your “toxic trait”?
By - The_bald_nerd
As a player I'm a button pusher. I want to see progress and things change I hate planning and caution
AS A DM I have 3 npcs. A gruff dwarf. Sad intellectual. Confident noble.
Honorable mention is I forget I have npcs in battle
Button pusher seems to be my constant. Characters do it in different ways, but I love to poke. Some are inquisitive, some are socially inept, some just actively like to push.
On the other hand. Teamwork is a constant non-toxic trait to. I use what I find out to make people work together just ad much
I’m an interrupter. I get really excited about things and blurt out when the dm or another player is talking. It’s a really bad habit and I’m working really hard to overcome it!
Also I make way too many shitty puns.
Well hello, I think you are me!
God damn me to a T
I do the same, except for the puns.
If I had a nickel for every shitty pun I’ve made at the table, I’d be able to retire.
I tend to lean towards de facto party leader in almost every game, whether by choice or not. My ideas aren't always good ones, but people follow me anyways.
That is compounded with the fact that I get a little frustrated when people take too long to act on something. Like, when a decision that should take about 5 minutes of discussion ends up taking 20, I'm usually the one that's like "fuck it, I'm doing something so something happens, good or bad".
...sometimes the party needs an instigator though.
This is 100% my issue too.
Bit of a difference being a party leader and instigator. Some people just lean in the leadership position, with other players instinctively following them. One of our regular DMs becomes the default party leader in the other game, unless another character steps up.
For sure, I'm saying I'm both
I have a bad habit of using myself as the main character all the time. I'll always be the one to initiate conversation with an NPC or take the lead on the activity that we're doing or direct combat actions etc. No one has ever called me out on it and I think that the fact that I'm aware of it and I actively try to avoid doing it too much helps, but it's something I have to be aware of all the time.
I feel that, same here. I just want to have a rich experience, but I feel awful for taking the spotlight too much
My default mode is sarcasm for my characters. I can RP reasonably well if I have time to plan, but put me on the spot and I start wisecracking
I guess that I am kind of a rules lawyer? Not that I impose the rules against the DM discretion, but I am the kind to red through the books and get invested in the mechanical part of it, so I remember the rules a bit better than my DM and way better than the other players; so from time to time, when a player and the DM are discussing if something is plausible, I may interject unprompted to say how it is RAW, not imposing it as how should it be done, but still giving that knowledge when not asked.
I have a player like you at my table, and he's my favori-- I mean, I love all my players equally.
Talk to the DM to let them know you're aware of the issue, you might be surprised to find they actually enjoy the knowledge you bring. I actively engage my "Rules Attorney." Whenever I'm uncertain on a rule, I straight up ask him, "Hey, what's RAW say on this?" Saves us soo much time, because even if he's not sure what the rules say precisely, he knows the book well enough that he can often find the rule before I can.
I pre-build my characters in too much detail, lv 1 warlock? Depending on how I'm gunna play him it's going to fine tune to a special build that is weirdly cheesy but not broken.
Then we never get past session 0.
Weirdly cheesy but not broken describes almost all of my characters.
I have a tendency to fall into 'It's what my character would do'. It's not too bad because I never play a murderhobo, but I have a tendency to make 'suboptimal decisions'. I imagine it gets old seeing carefully constructed plans fall apart because I'm playing someone impulsive.
People have praised my lack of metagaming though, so I hope no one is sick of me yet!
As a DM, I'm a bit of a fun-killer. I love seeing complete and utter chaos play out at the table, but when it actually comes to dealing with the ramifications of said chaos in-character, I lean pretty heavily on RAW / actual consequences and a lot less on "rule of cool" / "hey that would be pretty funny actually, sure I'll allow that".
As a player... well, given my knowledge of DM-only content, I know too much and it's really hard for me not to spoil everything. I also end up talking over other players a lot, though I'm actively working on trying to fix that habit.
I pester the DM about when we're going to level up more often than I should lol
Honestly, same here. Especially when I plan on multiclassing
I blurt out the names of monsters I recognize from reading the manual lol. Always try to curtail it but sometimes I’ll slip and the mystery is a little lost. Happened recently with an arcanoloth.
I’m inconsistent with how I rp my character. For example, my uncharacteristic barbarian can sometimes become magically articulate during important rp sessions.
I've gotten better at this, but my first 2 campaigns, I was just inconsiderate of the others. not intentionally, mind you, but the minutia I'd do (min/maxing, asking to use some homebrew I made myself, and overplanning) got on the nerves of the other players. I was unintentionally trying to be the main character I think
If I had to pick one, taking too long on my turn. I know the rules, I know I should plan ahead, but half the time when it comes to my turn I still end up stammering for 30-45 seconds trying to find the best solution only to end up casting fire bolt or magic missile again for the 5th time in a row once I realize that all my allies are bunched up together.
I can lose sight of what my players want in favor of what is “realistic” or would “actually” happen. Part of the draw for D&D is the power fantasy aspect for my players, and I need to be better at indulging it from time to time, even if its bends the logic of the world.
Fear of death. Let me explain
Some sorcerers took away our voices. We went to their camp. I was invisible, my teammate had a cloak giving them an advantage on stealth checks. Both had pass without trace
I still spent my inspiration to reroll stealth because 14 wasn't enough for me
Because for all that time we were preparing for the plan execution I had one thought: "One failed roll — and we're dead. Or worse. And we're not getting our voices back. Ever."
I don't know why I am so fixated on death, since (long story there) we had one of their sorcerers hostage.
And whenever somebody takes a lot of damage and/or drops unconscious in a battle with some powerful being, my thoughts are: "FUCK FUCK FUCK DON'T DIE DON'T DIE WE ONLY HAVE THREE ROUNDS BEFORE PROBABILITY STARTS SHIFTING TOWARDS DEATH"
And this is the reason why I'm (internally) begging people to have healing spells. And the reason I'm getting mad when my fellow DnD addicts reply (if the begging isn't internal anymore) with "I don't want to be a healbot". FOR FUCK'S SAKE I WANT YOU TO LIVE THROUGH THE CAMPAIGN, YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE FULL SUPPORT, YOU CAN ALSO DEAL DAMAGE, PLEASE HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL AND TAKE CURE WOUNDS
People don't like me panicking over someone dropping unconscious. Last game, a fighter went down and took two failed death saves ON THE SAME TURN. I was already saying goodbye to his character. I guess I can thank DM for switching a dozen of hungry goblins' attention towards other players who successfully dragged the fighter out and stabilized him. And were UNNATURALLY CALM THIS WHOLE TIME, LET ME THROUGH THIS FUCKING CROWD SO I CAN CAST CURE WOUNDS ON HIM AAAAAAAAAAA
So yeah. Fear of death
3 rounds is usually a loooong time in combat, a lot can happen before those rounds have passed and in most battles chances are combat is over before any character had a realistic chance of dying, at least in my experience.
I only have two 'modes': spectator and main character.
I tend to alternate between the two in one of my games, where I'm simply in the background making a couple of rolls one session, then the primary spokesperson getting most stuff done the next. As the group bardlock, I'm 90% of the team's impulse control (Dad Bard rather than Horny Bard) on most days, so to avoid becoming a total killjoy, sometimes I'll just sit back and let things unfold without my hand in it.
I do check in with my GM to make sure I'm not 'stealing' the game from anyone, as well as the other players. TBH, I'm never sure if they're honest with me when they say it's fine, which is why I'll become a Wallflower to give them space to play as well, but I'm working on it.
Second problem trait is that I keep recycling the same 5 characters over and over, and they're all Beef Stroganoff Stronk Man™ but in different flavors. It's a hell of a chore for me to bring something new to the table in that regard.
I am always the “where the fuck did this character come from and how the fuck do they fit in” one. Party full of dramatic and serious characters looking for gold and adventure? Hi, I’m your newest Firbolg who doesn’t have a name, frequently says ‘no thank you” when given gold, and is more interested in talking to the trees.
I easily have the most 5e knowledge at our table and I sometimes worry I'm obnoxious when I elaborate or correct someone on rules. I've asked them to let me know if I'm getting annoying, I can turn it off. So far they haven't so I'm hoping they're not doing go avoid confrontation.
I have a guy at my table who gets legitimately mad when the DM doesn’t use RAW, so as long as you’re not doing that, I’m sure it’s fine.
Oh hell no. I always defer to the DM on final ruling, even if it goes directly against the rules. I'm there to help a lot of the new players.
I played my formative years in large campaigns and I naturally speak at a low volume and am short so I spent so much time being talked over, now that I’m a vet in smaller games I have a bad habit of. Talking over people and doing all the things
I don't pay attention. This is mostly an issue in my online campaign, but I don't have much of an idea of what's going on in the plot right now because I get distracted by other stuff.
I am really fuckin paranoid and I check everything for traps. That and my characters are always very chaotic. Usually they don't cross the line, but sometimes it gets out of control
I talk a lot.
I probably let on too much to my players outside of the game - too much discussing tactics etc
Players who race to the loot at the end of every encounter as if they're competing with the rest of the group. Especially when the characters or objects being looted hold relevance for other PC's.
Crazy ideas, and suddenly just "getting" the mystery. My logical mind will allways look for solutions to everything.
I am the Little Prince: I'm the guy who will break all the DM's encounters without even trying to. I also try to adopt every NPC I meet. Even the evil ones and redeem them. I killed a spell caster who was much higher level than me with a flaming towel. At level one. . .I play a lot of Barbarians. I've been told I'm "A pain in the ass to DM for." I will spend the whole session role-playing, I don't even care if we combat. When we do combat, I will try to do anything else except just rolling to attack. Unless I play a magic user, then my issue flips and I can't stop trying to nuke things because I want a power fantasy. I'm not afraid to min-max. This is my confession.
Not sure if it's considered toxic, but all my characters are basically me. I'm far too socially awkward and nowhere near good enough at roleplay to pretend to be someone I'm not, therefore all my characters end up with pretty much the exact same behaviour, even if their backgrounds and classes differ.
I also can't stand it when the group is being overly cautious, I'm always down for a good plan but when I find that people are overanalyzing something trivial, you're damn right I'm going to leeroy it so something finally happens, damn the consequences.
I have a few.
1. Switching characters.
Like... I have a hard time sticking with one character for a full 4-6 month campaign. Even if I love the character I'm playing, I have so many ideas and concepts and the like for various different characters that sticking with one for so long sometimes feels painful.
2. The "um akshually" reflex. This is the one I hate most about myself: for example, when a player wants to disarm an enemy and the DM makes something up on the fly, my gut reaction is to tell them that the player can use one of their attacks (if they have multiple) to disarm an enemy with competing Athletics checks. It's not always apparent as a player when a DM is intentionally doing their own thing or if they don't know what the RAW application would be (if any), so it's a bit iffy sometimes for me feeling whether or not I should say anything. That, and I've built some characters around being able to do certain things by RAW and some looser DMs ignoring those things completely in favor of their own way that the build is much much less effective at.
3. SIDEQUESTS. So many of my characters are proactive rather than reactive, so when my character has ideas to go and do something separate from what the DM had planned for the adventure, it can often throw huge wrenches into the plans of DMs who lack intense improv skills.
I have the “actually” reflex too! I try and channel it into my turns as a dm, but it’s hard
I'm basically a forever DM, so I don't get to play too often. When I do, I have an unfortunate tendency to be too interactive, and can hog the limelight fairly often. I don't mean to, I just get so excited to be a player instead of the DM and get overzealous. I'm working on reigning it in
I have no filter. I'm aware I have no filter so I actively filter myself to make sure I don't offend or hurt anyone's feelings. With close friends who understand me they know I'm just being honest and mean no ill will. But when playing DND it's usually with strangers so they wouldn't "understand" me. So filter on.
And it's especially hard as you RP a character. You have to not only make sure you're not being impersonal. But then think how your character would respond as them and not you. Honestly it is a good mental exercise and I find the game helping me develop certain social skills so I don't immediately push people away with my first thoughts in other situations as well as with my friends. But instead try to think how they will feel if I say that and if I can say something else while still true to me is more well received by others.
Ironically enough DND is like therapy in this regard. It's teaching me how to be a better person by forcing me to play a person better than I am. I don't want to offend my close friends even if they are understanding of me. So I use the lessons I learn to grow as a person.
Although my close friends do sometimes occasionally ask me to turn my filter off when they want a "more real person" to talk to.
I hate sitting around coming up with a plan at the table OOC as a player. Mostly because despite our planning things generally don’t work out as we expected anyways.
Like for example, the party might be thinking a place is booby trapped and want to check every door for a trap in every place we explore. Unless my character is paranoid and thinks there are traps around every corner I generally just do what I want until I trigger a traps afterwords I approach with more caution.
The worst thing that’s happened to me is that I’ve taken some damage and revealed the trap to the party. I don’t know I just hate trying to metagame our way out of a dungeon.
I DM, so sometimes I struggle to forget certain details from statblocks and end up subconsciously metagaming.
I've had to make a chart for what my characters would do in certain scenarios with only the knowledge they would have
Yeah that's me too, additionally I turn into an "achually" person because I am the forever DM, but I am working on it and recently only do that when our current DM says stuff like "let's wing it" and I know the rules as for example the rule for fall dmg.
I am very strictly by the rules and it bugs me supremely when someone goes off rules in some way. It can be really bad at times.
I always create anthro characters. Dragonborn, tabaxi, Leonin, kenku, you name it. That’s just about it, and when I role them I try to give an interpretation of the animal (or magical beast) that they represent.
I've got a near perfect memory, especially for things that I read. Great for telling the story of what happened last session even if it's been months. Great for diving into new systems. ...Also great for quoting the rulebooks nearly verbatim about the effects of different things, making me a rules lawyer technically. Fortunately, playing with friends no one cares about getting the rules wrong so I'm fine. ;D
Most annoying thing for me personally is that I automatically slip into a RP accent for any character, no matter how weird an English accent is for them. I'm going to see if my raspy-voiced Goblin in a pathfinder game will break that trend.
Im all about gags
Impatience. I get bored if any single thing takes too long. Dungeon crawl, combat, roleplaying. Quick and concise, I have shit to do.
I'm a bit (much) of a rule lawyer, and i tend to think too much to my alignment instead of doing stuff
I'm very self-conscious of not coming off annoying about it lol but I love to ship my characters with NPCs and always have my elf eyes on the lookout for romance options in game
My necromancer has social anxiety and needs a party member to accompany her to talk to NPCs
I know the rules really well because in my mind knowing the limits opens me to the options that are possible. Problem is I sometimes interrupt whenever rules questions come up and it’s undermining the dm.
I am a new charater but a flaw of mine might make the DM mad.
No I mean THIS CHARATER if anything contains a chicken my charater will hyperfixate. I hope this does not end in demise
I always make my male wizard PCs evil. And not in the murder hobo way. I basically always turn into the goddamn villain. I normally DM very political games so the whole game of thrones political villain thing is my default setting. But whenever I'm a wizard I feel the urge to always be in control and manipulate what's going on. Hard part is I'm good at it. To the point where even though my table knows its like my thing, I always out maneuver them even when they are meta game saying "be careful it's caleb" during every interactions.
I'm just too good at leverage and making people want what I want. It kinda worries me about what it shows about myself.
My toxic trait is that I’m borderline a Rules Lawyer. I don’t jump in and interrupt people or the DM during play, but sometimes I’ll point out rules or specific wording on abilities to make sure things are fair. I’ve been given the blessing to do this by the DM and the rest of the group, because we’re all friends and I’ve been in 5e the longest, but I still feel like I do it too much
I have a habit of weaponizing random junk. Bag of sand, potato sack, buckets and rope; I will find a way to use it in combat
I always like to have “cool moments”. Something badass, unexpected, a really good one-liner, you name it. Not necessarily coming from me either. I just love those moments.
But the game isn’t always about that. You gotta have the mundane with the magical, as it were. I just get antsy sometimes. I have trouble relaxing. That’s probably where I falter, is with the downtime.
I have a few hard time playing a character that isn’t charismatic, and I tend to lean into a trickster sub personality.
I still try too much to be a DM.
I'll answer any of the DM's questions they have for other players when they wanna do something, I speak up about the rules every single chance I get, I often go "um actually".
I always try and connect backstories with my party members.
I alternate between talking too much and too little. I’m either way too quick to engage or answer questions in game, and that leads to me dominating the conversation. When I realize that’s happening, I 180 into barely talking at all, cause I don’t wanna be an attention hog. I can never seem to strike the right balance and I always feel bad about it
I guess I could be considered impatient. But hear me out:
I'm a forever DM. I've been playing for years and I'm always the DM. I have literally hundreds of characters, I'm constantly creating more, and I never get to use any of them. The few times I actually get an opportunity to be a player, I just want to do all the fun things I've been wanting to do. I don't wanna waste too much time just fooling around. I don't like spending minutes trying to decide what to do and/or what's the plan... i generally just wanna get the basic stuff out of the way quickly so I can go to the fun RP moments, interesting plot revelations and epic combats with powerful monsters (Yeah, I also hate playing at low levels). Because of that, sometimes and might end up making decisions for the group just so we can move quickly.
As a forever DM, when I do get the chance to play I agree with "button pusher." The kick I get out of playing is when I interact with the DM on the meta "gameplay" level, where I'm doing things not from a character perspective, but to make the DM (and sometimes the other players) react to something unexpected. It's the same kick I get out of DMing nowadays (putting choices in front of players and seeing how they react), just from the other side of the screen.
I try to never be malicious about it, I'm watching for the spark in their eyes, not the grudging sigh. I try to be the chaos that adds something exciting, not the chaos that derails or frustrates. I don't always do it perfectly, I don't always stop when I should, but I try my best.
In a similar vein, I tend to push the narrative buttons too when the group isn't making headway. I'm the guy that gets sick of the debate and kicks down the door. I'm the guy that picks up the obviously cursed item for shits and giggles.
I’m a sub-optimal, shit-stirrer. Most of my PCs are built poorly (or at least could be better with more thoughtful planning), and all of them push stir the pot, directly or indirectly. I’m hoping to play someone nice and competent. One day….
I really like rules. I know sometimes it's good to help the DM or by reminding them of a rule, and sometimes you gotta keep your mouth shut, but the fact is I don't know the difference. Sorry DM
I don’t know if toxic is the right word but my halfling rogues tend to be chain smokers even though I’ve never smoked a cigarette in my entire life.
Giving our Dm ideas how to destroy our plans by overthinking how i would destroy them
Too often I'm too focused on my character to keep in mind the other players and PCs.
Thankfully it doesn't come up as protagonist syndrome, but I really need to work on paying attention to the details others say about their characters.
Seems like next session my PC's big secret will be revealed so hopefully the part of my brain that's been focusing on keeping that hidden can switch to noting tidbits about other PCs that my PC doesn't immediately glom onto.
Unless you know your group on a close personal level, playing a character addicted to something, is probably not a good idea. You can still play a character who loves to drink, drinks to forget, to numb pain, etc… but playing a character who is actually addicted to alcohol is not a good idea. Using something that has torn apart countless families IRL might not be fun for people who don’t want to be reminded of it. I’m not criticizing the OP, since for all I know they are playing with people they know very close and it’s not an issue to play an alcoholic, but instead just commenting on people who play alcoholics in general.
Fortunately I’m well aquatinted with the people I play with. I started making alcoholic characters as a way to role-play my ignorance when I first started playing (which fortunately the DM at the time thought was hilarious) and it started becoming a habit. But, my most recent character I ended up making a ranger who’s never set foot inside a tavern as a way to break out of that habit. I agree making characters that are addicts can end up pissing off other players and for good reason, that’s why I made this post to see what other things players do that aren’t exactly “good” ways to play the game.
I always want to fudge my dice as a player. I know I shouldn’t, and i try not to. but the urge always hits me when I roll that 3 on an important check
My character throws everyone we meet off a cliff and it almost always kills them the only time I didn't was when I threw a sorcerer npc off a cliff and then I blasted them down with a mgic missile and a fireball.
If there hasn't been enough fighting or action recently a fireball is getting cast at something to stir shit up.