By - crazyaceinspace
When you are in the appointment, tell the doctor you did not want to do this and still do not want to. If they are a good doctor they will not perform the exam on you. Also depending on your state 16 may be old enough to override some parental control over your body.
Your mum doesn't have to be in the room. Just tell the gyno you don't want a physical exam. No one can make you do it.
if you’re not comfortable don’t do it. you’ve never met them so you can’t expect yourself to push to that. tell your mum that you are absolutely not open to it and no matter what she says you will say no to it! stand up for yourself
Most gynecologists start by having you fill in a form about your medical history, symptoms, whether you're sexually active and whether you have ever been sexually abused/raped. It makes the appointment more efficient but also much less awkward since you don't have to say it out loud.
Check with the doctor first, but this should all be completely confidential at your age.
I doubt they'd want to do a pelvic exam on a 16 year old, but you can say no if they do. I'd expect the appointment to just be a conversation, but of course that depends on your specific situation.
Adding: if you’re uncomfortable writing it down, you can start the appointment by telling the doctor the short version. You do NOT have to do the exam, not even if they tell you that you should, not for any reason at all. It’s ok to say no, and keep saying no.
If it helps..mine did no internal exam. He felt my stomach area to see if my uterus has dropped or was upside down or something of that nature before sending me off to an experienced person who did the internal scan. The gyno before him didnt go an internal pelvic on me either. It was always going to another place/person for internal scans.
I'm not too experienced with this. But if you don't want an internal exam, you can decline it! Any good doctor will be ok with that. If you don't want your mom in the room, you can ask her to wait in the lobby or outside the room. If she won't listen to you the doctor/their staff/security can escort her out (hopefully it won't escalate to that but I've seen it happen).
At 16, your parent does not need to be in the room with you, and the Gyno does not need to do a pelvic exam if you are not comfortable with that. I know it’s super hard, but doctors and nurses are the type of people that need to know about your history. That can help them create a care plan for you. You probably won’t need to go into details, just let the nurse know when you first get into the exam room. They’re all about making you comfortable and taking care of you. Usually they have experience working with people that have had similar experiences, so they should be very accommodating. It’ll be ok. You can always write it out on a slip of paper and hand it to the nurse if you aren’t comfortable saying it out loud too.