T O P

Carbon monoxide

Carbon monoxide

DogfishDave

She's a comedian - it's well worth reading more of her Twitter.


CheerioJack

Yeah, I knew this was some joke. It's wayyyy too obvious, but Reddit is extremely gullible.


notsure500

Wait. People were taking this seriously? I've seen this joke posted here several times and I chuckle every time I see it.


bocephus67

Have you looked around lately? Lots of idiots taking nonsense seriously.


mudslags

>Lots of idiots taking nonsense seriously. Have you heard about President Trump, he was their leader.


Skwurls4brkfst

IS their leader. Going to be reinstated *any* minute now...


WatIsMyLif3

As an American, I sure hope not. But I may just be one of the rare sane ones...


Skwurls4brkfst

Rest assured, it's not even possible.


WatIsMyLif3

Let's hope and pray my friend


[deleted]

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[deleted]

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reply-guy-bot

The above comment was stolen from [this one](http://np.reddit.com/r/HolUp/comments/p3woe1/carbon_monoxide/h8uwcwi/) elsewhere in this comment section. It is probably not a coincidence; here is some more evidence against this user: Plagiarized | Original -------- | ----------- [Then how do birds 🦅 fly?](http://np.reddit.com/r/blackmagicfuckery/comments/p3zomu/floating/h8w3v1w/) | [Then how do birds 🦅 fly?](http://np.reddit.com/r/blackmagicfuckery/comments/p3zomu/floating/h8vpgb8/) [I didn't know to be Black...](http://np.reddit.com/r/cursedcomments/comments/p4223y/cursed_question/h8w3rjv/) | [I didn't know to be Black...](http://np.reddit.com/r/cursedcomments/comments/p4223y/cursed_question/h8vu662/) [Which is why I never unde...](http://np.reddit.com/r/tumblr/comments/p3zd6p/sometimes_vampire_romance_is_just_plain_old_cute/h8w3qqg/) | [Which is why I never unde...](http://np.reddit.com/r/tumblr/comments/p3zd6p/sometimes_vampire_romance_is_just_plain_old_cute/h8vz0m3/) beep boop, I'm a bot -|:] It is this bot's opinion that [/u/Superb_Opposite_3146](https://np.reddit.com/u/Superb_Opposite_3146/) should be banned for karma manipulation. Don't feel bad, they are probably a bot too. Confused? Read the [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/user/reply-guy-bot/comments/n9fpva/faq/?plagiarist=Superb_Opposite_3146) for info on how I work and why I exist.


MailmetotheMoon

Don't worry we're giving him peru! FELIZ NAVIDA!


Darth_Dronus

It’s not a story the republicans will tell you


Healthy_Search_4547

5. That’s the average number of comments I have to scroll down to before finding someone turning absolutely any type of post into political commentary. Congratulations on being a living and breathing meme.


bottlerocketz

I did the same thing and now I am dead 🤷🏼‍♂️


mlddl

At this point everything is a joke.


CheerioJack

I'll remember that next time I look in the mirror.


mlddl

You wont have to look in a mirror to remind yourself.


mooingmango

People do say reality is stranger than fiction though - at least fiction still needs to stick to possibilities and logic.


airportwhiskey

It’s almost word for word a joke from the movie Garden State (2004), though I doubt that it was first anyone had said it then either.


Unleashtheducks

That’s ridiculous, women can’t tell jokes. That’s why I either get angry when a women tells a joke or refuse to believe they are joking.


CheerioJack

LMFAO!


ragnalich

Ik it's a joke, but i've seen ppl who are actually that dumb


TheUn5een

Na it’s probably real. I diiid hn same hing coz sheer beeping. Nite


CheerioJack

.... Huh?


thanks_its_a_box

No one was taking it as anything but a joke though???


Toxic_Puddlefish

Ok but someone on reddit has literally had their life saved by someone suspecting carbon monoxide poisoning before it was too late for them. So not as far fetched as it seems.


HaloGuy381

To be strictly fair, people are so spectacularly dumb irl and on here, particularly in certain groups, that it would be 100% within expectations of stupidity to hear someone say this seriously.


Bale626

To be fair, this is the internet, and we all know there are actually people this stupid out there.


Creeper15877

Everyone knows it’s a joke bro


Fig1024

in this day and age, it's hard to tell who's a real comedian


CODMer-hari

And here I thought it was some Karen joke


[deleted]

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qxxxr

You seem stable, in touch with reality, and not at all like you get your opinions from doomscrolling memes.


ronaldmcbadass

What did they say


qxxxr

Iirc "it's never worth reading twitter" or something. Usual completely irrelevant, dumbfuck generalizations from a vapid, reactive mind.


kismethavok

Reminds me of the guy who spent like 20 minutes taking a shit in a toilet full of bleach, weird way to commit suicide.


roachRancher

Wait, what?


kismethavok

It was on r/tifu a few days ago, guy fills toilet he rarely uses with bleach and forgets about it, has to shit but brother is using other toilet, spends like 20 minutes poisoning himself with chlorine gas.


DragonK123

Mf rlly couldn't flush earlier?


DZP

My farts may be lethal but at least they don't contain chlorine. Although I killed my proctologist and bleached his hair.


copee

I tried googling this and it either seems like a common occurrence or a common lie.


whatsbobgonnado

if you know a better place to store bleach besides a spare functioning toilet I'd like to hear it!


1Strangeartist

My body is ready.


Bobsupman

Great way to get rid of the Covid.


Polymathy1

It's a lie. First, it takes a fairly short time for bleach to break doen when exposed to air. It even breaks down in a sealed container. Second, poop is unlikely to contain any ammonia (urine does), and therefore very unlikely to cause this reaction. Several acidic cleaners can cause toxic chloramine gas to be released, but poop is really unlikely to do that.


Barskepus

I just read it. He said he urinated and heard a foam like sound. He also used NINETY percent bleach in the bucket


Polymathy1

The ... dead guy said this? Bucket? Ninety percent of the volume was 5% (w/v%) household bleach, or he somehow got his hands on bleach that was 45x stronger..?


Barskepus

He didn't die, but he had burn effects from the bleach.


Dimplesb

But while pooping theres always also some peeing?


Fancy_Fingers5000

Hmm seems unlikely he could’ve done this with household bleach, it’s toxic but for the most part idiot proof, especially something like this. He would’ve needed some industrial strength bleach. He also would’ve needed WC with absolutely no ventilation, so that when he walked into the WC the chlorine should’ve knocked him over… so to get past all those obstacles…he’s a Darwin Award winner for sure!


CosmologistCramer

This actually happened to my grandmother. The CO detector went off so she assumed the batteries needed replacing. She replaced them, but it continued to go off, so she threw it out and meant to get a new one, but forgot. Months later my mom went into the basement to get some Christmas decorations for her and the walls were dripping with condensation. The chimney was plugged with pine needles and had been venting into the basement. After they cleared the clog my grandma said she felt years younger. She just thought she was getting old... She has COPD so she sleeps with an oxygen mask, which is probably the only thing that kept her alive through those months.


lpmusix

I get it, but just funny how the thought process was "this damn thing is broken!", wonder how long until they print "Do not disregard, it isn't broken" on the front of them.


WanderlostNomad

manufacturers probably should change the beep into : "this room is filled with poisonous gas!" cycling into different languages. so even the old/senile would get the gist of it.


mvppaulo

People are sometimes weird. I live in an apartment and when I got back from work the other day, there was a fire alarm in one of the other apartments. I've waited a couple minutes and then called the fire department. When they arrived, most people in the building came by out of curiosity, and when I asked "did none of you heard it?" they all said they didn't care much. A woman even said "I turned the volume up on my tv because it annoyed me" It turned out something was burning, for more than 3 hours. [pic related](https://i.imgur.com/z28tslw.jpg)


masterxc

These types of things are why I like more "smart home" stuff. It's a shame it's basically the wild west in terms of what you can get and how to set them up...


fish312

> I like more "smart home" stuff Yeah? well wait till your "smart" carbon monoxide detector stops working due to a failed update, a loss of internet connectivity, or a subscription renewal issue.


masterxc

Nor saying they're perfect. They have a long way to go to be reliable devices, but it would certainly help.


MailmetotheMoon

standardization benefits everyone. Hell look at desktops. You can keep one running for decades at minimal cost just by swapping out parts every so often. Your smart phone? That'll be $200 to replace the battery every four years please.


shawster

I feel like $200 every four years is very inexpensive to keep a desktop modern.


MailmetotheMoon

No-one said anything about modern, I said functional. Wanna drop $1000 on a new phone every 4 years instead? You don't need to upgrade all the time, if it works it works. Stop keeping up with the joneses. Power supplies can last 5-10 years, and a second hand one costs around $20 to replace. Typically around $40-50 new. an ssd should last around 10 years. The samsung 860 evo 500gb, which is higher end price wise I'd say, is $85 with covid pricing. ssds have the added benefit of not breaking when you drop them in case you move a lot. Cpus will last around 20-30 years before experiencing any wear and tear, and advancements are coming slower and slower a ton of older processors still hold up today. motherboard's are a bit finnicky, but it's usually the caps on them that die first. This is the #1 reason why old pcs are slow. Looking at anywhere from 3-10 year lifespan but if you know how to solder you can extend it as long as you replace the caps before they leak and damage the board. If they look puffy it's time to go! Around $50 to replace the whole board. Cheap pc fans tend to last 3-6 years. Good quality ones can last longer, and doing maintenance on em will make them last longer still. $30 for a decent 5 pack. Ram lasts pretty much forever IF you don't damage it (such as esd when touching it) this is why ram often comes with a lifetime warranty. A case? Will last forever. It's a box. So, lets say, every 10 years. That comes to...$195 on the low end? $325 on the high end? If you only buy new parts and don't maintain/repair them. On the flipside, my current "modern" pc cost me around $400 to build. Ryzen 5 2400g, 8gb gb of ram. $20 used hard drive. b-350 motherboard. Case. 400w power supply. Beat dark souls 3 on it. The ryzen 5 2400g back then was $140, I bought it the month it came out. The case was $40? new. $20 hard drive. 8gb of ram back then was around $100 according to google. which is more than double of where the price typically sits. 400w psu was $40 Fans, again, $30. Motherboard was around $60? A little more than $400. But still roughly $400. I've since added a SSD and another 8gb stick of ram which brought my total cost up to $600. 3 years in, works like a charm. Don't expect to do any work on it for another few years.


CosmologistCramer

I’m not saying she wasn’t dumb for discarding the thing. I still give her grief for it (she’s not that senile yet).


lpmusix

Yeah, I get it in terms of CO poisoning has that kind of effect.


CosmologistCramer

Oh that makes a lot of sense. Now I feel bad.


TheNerdChaplain

This also actually happened to Weird Al Yankovic's parents. They died of carbon monoxide poisoning while he was on tour.


cherrrymoya

Wow that’s wild and I’m glad she made it through. CO2 alarms should come with instructions on what causes the build up so people know why they are going off IMO


generogue

Minor correction, it’s CO (carbon monoxide) that’s the really dangerous one. CO2 (carbon dioxide) is something we exhale.


CosmologistCramer

It’s almost always fuel burning. Whether it’s your furnace, hot water heater, dryer, a grill, or your car engine... it’s an inevitable byproduct of burning hydrocarbons (gasoline, natural gas, propane, etc.). Doing any of that in your home is inherently dangerous and it should be properly vented.


cyberpunk3025

Wonder if Ruthe made it?


CreatiScope

She's a comedian


SUNAWAN

In japan they say idiots live longer


PhotonPainter

Old but gold


nicolacavalieri

I think I didn't get it


Satanus9001

Carbon monoxide poisining gives those symptoms and the alarm was going off exactly as intended, because it detected CO.


nicolacavalieri

Ok thanks


Satanus9001

Sure mate. Cheers.


Fuck_you_Reddit_Nazi

r/whoosh


Dogfukdhorselooknass

Nice name mate


SUNAWAN

So it doesn't cause the decrease of intelligence...


SkilllessBeast

Well technically you have a 0 IQ, when you are dead.


[deleted]

Relax,have a cigarette..


YaBoiAcey

wasn’t this in an episode of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia


mstifler101

Charlie Work.


Listan83

See you in the morning!


Theory_Unusual

Have that furnace heat exchanger inspected


scarcityflow

What an Unusual Theory


noobnoobgetsit73

Seems legit.


userjawn

Wow this kinda checks out as a holup, I can’t believe it


Irrational-actor

Good stuff


itsdeadwolf97

Carbon moron-xide


Asleep-Long7239

Can I post this again tomorrow?


Reborn-leech

Wait at least 2 weeks , thats the standard.


FatScout

added OP to my block list. Karma farmers are so boring.


MattR0se

But only if you screenshot it, resize to at most 60%, and save as JPEG.


Techmoji

This is what I’m on the sub for. Finally some good content


Spuddermane

Natural selection at its finest


mikefrombarto

I know this is just a joke, but it’s almost like an analogy about anti-vaxxer/anti-masker/covid-hoaxer idiocy, and it’s brilliant!


Time-2-Get-Cereal

Haha I was thinking the same thing!


ItzKenzyGachaYT

Oof size: Maximum


durgadas

Comedy for the Trump Belt


Kflynn1337

I know it's a joke.. but that's anti-vaxx thinking in a nutshell.


1Beecw

This is soooooo true for sooooooo many


TheManicMonocle

I hope "Phoenix" isn't just a name


wcslater

Good explanation of the difference between correlation and causation


mooptastic

Carbon Mononoke


Mikobjectbook

*wait*


Alternative_Deal7421

Interesting point, older people can’t hear the alarms. They need to have more base or bright lighting


Ruggi_2001

Hopefully she is now in a quieter place 😌 Plus, we all know it's a joke


Puzzleheaded-Fill-41

Ma'am


ToxicDemon420

She probably works for WebMD


No_Explanation1714

Damn I had that problem when i tried to turn on my stove inside but the stove wouldn’t ignite I think it’s too dark better go turn on the light


keshudioo

My dad happened to say the same thing 'beeping made me crazy so I threw it off' and I laughed so hard. Note that we had a really cheep alarm that went off even with the windows open and in any part of the house, luckily we never actually had a carbon monoxide incident.


IkRedDitNiet

She lived to tell the tale


know-more_lies

Wait try to use a bird in a cage ... if the bird sleep everything is fine 😁


Efficient_Bug_2466

R.E.P.O.S.T.


Bu1135

Ruthe Phoenix was never seen again.


TheCubicalGuy

That’s it That’s what anti-vaxxers sounds like /q


QuarterlyTurtle

This was so funny iy took my breath away


hotsweatyspaghetti

Carbon Moronoxide


Tank_blitz

"survival of the fittest"


machin3z3r0

I swear this happened: I worked at a hardware store in Chicago. We had a lot of maintenance guys come in that were in charge of rentals in the area. Some were good and some were cheap. One guy bought a carbon monoxide detector in the morning (to replace a faulty one at tenants request) and was back before lunch to return it because it "all the time, beep beep beep". The clerk pointed out that it was not beeping now, (note: this is a device with a disposable battery and is always on once activated.) he suggested the maintenance guy call the fire department. Not sure of the outcome here. Same store, different guy buys 10 bug bombs (probably trying to rid bedbugs) clerk tells him very frankly to be sure all pilot lights are out and windows open. Guy does not speak English well and didn't understand the importance of that info. Couple hours later, an explosion shattered most windows in the kitchen and deck of an apartment just a few thousand feet away. Bomb squad responds and closes off blocks thinking it was some sort of terrorist thing. You could write a book of all the things I saw there....


brainLMAO420

Just lay down on the floor for a while


Why-just-why_007

She is a intellectually superior being


DerotciV

I wonder if the house is full of post it notes


-Lila_

why


PrayingMantisII

It's OK, you're fine, just take a couple of deep breaths


_Screw_The_Rules_

Also a good metaphor for the people who deny the existence of covid 19...


1Strangeartist

I just sleep through them.


jaxsonnz

You joke but I had this at work once. How do we stop it beeping so we can go back into the lab? I know what I did to set the alarm off so it’s ok 🤔🙄


stupidthefrog

I actually had that alarm,my guy Jared was to lazy to get up.Oh,Jared!


BasicNewb

Well at least she lived to tell about it


dimitarivanov200222

No alarms and no surprised


DeMiloTurt

Wheeze


GordonBlack707

Antivax logic


DayroneGreen

The satire is affecting my nips.


Wharghoul-Army

Oh good thinking make sure to take the batteries out of the smoke detector also those can get loud too


_GOLDen_Pum-Pum_

Smart one


HyperSniper208

ಠ_ಠ Is someone gonna tell her?


Otherwise_Care_9522

And watch yourself on that ladder, you could get dizzy….


Theory_Unusual

Well this time of year I'd look into the flue pipe for the water heater


rene_333

Natural selection let it happen just let it happen....


Imanerrrd

it was a joke


CheerioJack

This has to be a troll/joke. No-one can be THAT stupid.


Imanerrrd

she's a comedian


CheerioJack

That's my point...


Huxm_luxl

u got the iq of a foetus?


CheerioJack

"foetus"


Huxm_luxl

you don't know what that is?


CheerioJack

Yes, I'm laughing at you because that's how dumb-ass Brits spell "fetus". Your grammar is really bad and you want to talk about IQ points? "u got the iq of a foetus"... LMFAOOO!


Huxm_luxl

ok I'll go eat fish and chips and shove Yorkshire puddings up my arse ooh look at me I'm from 'murca with good grammar in a language thats called English. thats all their is too it


CheerioJack

Punctuation is important, Mr. IQ-man.


Huxm_luxl

keep talking and we will colonise you again


n0_1_here

High all mighty dumb dumb.


Manjodarshi

Natural selection at it again.....


glitterkittehkat

She deaded


mysteryguy144

Alarm - "So you have chosen death."


LordMunchu

Kekw


Infinite_Relation_86

Darwin Award 🥈


Carrotf11

Anti-vaxxer summarised.


skill-seeker

But did she die?


dudefromthepast3

Its, a, satire


MaxMadisonVi

r/TechnicallyTheTruth