T O P

  • By -

kal69er

I don't see why that would be illegal compared to truck nuts. I guess check your local laws for stuff concerning truck nuts or other "decorations"


MadClam97

Yeah that law could be different in different countys/states


AnonNo9001

iirc Florida is the only state where truck nuts are illegal don't remember where I read this and it could be outdated so take that with a grain of salt illegal or not sure as hell doesn't stop us down here lol


jbronin

Wait, they are illegal in Florida? That's the last place I'd expect them to be banned


AnonNo9001

Yeah me too. Just about everything is legal here lol


CrossP

Trucks are invasive in Florida and wreaking destruction on native wildlife. All domesticated trucks must be spayed or neutered.


Parmak64

You joke but a "Truck Weekend" in Daytona FL resulted in over 1,600 citations and dozens upon dozens of arrests. Truck owners trashed the town and caused a gridlock for two days on the barrier island, absolute chaos lmao. https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/daytona-truck-meets-future-is-in-question-after-a-weekend-of-mayhem/ar-AAL4WBw


MisterJackCole

I suppose on the bright side the communities where those "estimated 5,000 oversized vehicles" originated from were probably pleasantly quieter for that particular weekend.


kottabaz

The trucks were gone, and so were the faux train horns strapped to them.


just_call_me_ash

What [majestic creatures](https://youtu.be/xVcL1tbsidk?t=23) they are though.


[deleted]

ignorant truck owners releasing their exotic vehicles into the everglades like they wont decimate the native golfcart population smh 🤦 Remember what happened when the invasive asian cars were introduced to lake michigan? Completely devastated the ecosystem. My uncle was just mindin his own business fishin when toyota hylux jumped out of the water and hit him straight in the head. Now hes got brain damage.


CrossP

Fuckin' zebra muscle cars.


Humble-Eye-9278

Just the owners.


FunDivertissement

thanks for the belly laugh


KevinReems

I see them all the time in Florida. If there's a law against it I'd say it isn't enforced.


Andthentherewasbacon

I mean, not even recreational weed is legal in Florida. It's just that nothing is enforced.


feralkitten

When are yall getting legal weed? I expect Florida to be the first Southern state to get it.


1biggeek

Yeah evangelists don’t want to acknowledge that body part.


nightmuzak

They could change their state motto to Truck Nuts Cradle of Life and no one would even question it.


e-JackOlantern

Probably made it illegal just so the kind of people who hang bumper nuts can get off on it.


Decapitated_gamer

I see like 4-5 a day here in central Florida. Just cause it’s written doesn’t mean it’s enforced.


uselessartsdegree

How do people get hold of them? Like, what motivates them to one day say *my truck needs a pair of balls* and then buy them on Amazon? Or are they GAG gifts? Is everyone just sticking them on the backs of trucks because they were gifted them? Who even thought of coming up with truck nuts anyway? So many questions.


zaneymcfucksmith

They only accept real nuts there.


tsavong117

technically speaking it's illegal to shower naked in Florida as well.


warfangiscute

Wait what?


ToeJamFootballer

It is illegal to have sexual relations with a porcupine. 7. Florida's state constitution prohibits confining pregnant pigs to cages. https://www.onlyinyourstate.com/florida/silly-laws-2-fl/


WolframXero

From the looks of it the senate voted to impose a $60 fine but it didn't pass the house in April 2008 [Source](https://www.reuters.com/article/newsOne/idUSN4O32105020080425)


RolAcosta

Yeah, I remember them passing a law against it. But I'm not sure if it held up or not. I used to see them often enough regardless.


SHIELD_Agent_47

I should point out that depending on local culture, what a court okays is different from what the police will tolerate. If certain people with influence on the police hate a giant organ model so much, the police may harass the OP anyway. And that’s nothing to say of vigilantes.


Rotty2707

Don't you mean vagilantes?


Ellora-Victoria

Hang Ovaries on the hitch. If you get pulled over, ask the officer. Log onto Reddit and give us an update!


florinandrei

If your truck is a Dodge, then you're good to go already. https://external-preview.redd.it/1w5MiTgPGaB0V-Jd44GsawCOVKTW_TFei9vcZCjn9zs.png?auto=webp&s=80e150a1d483e0625401f27a5bc2c4044acb56dd


onceandbeautifullife

Great idea! Or claim they're 'Klackers'? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bs7GAEkJITI


heyoukidsgetoffmyLAN

>"Now the original Miracle Klackers are unbreakable and shatterproof. Look for Miracle Klackers in this package." If you are blind, please ask store for assistance in finding original Miracle Klackers.


YoukoUrameshi

And hopefully post the dash cam video!


whaleoil_beef_hooked

If they survive. Make sure you aren't the wrong color when you try this.


andre2020

Truly important suggestion!


mydoglixu

Ovaries are basically female nuts.


e-JackOlantern

Well I can see a vas deferens between the two.


lappi99

Dude because they're bull nuts. Entirely different. Then again... If you where they put a cow vagina there...


Noladixon

They may be bull nuts but they are human bull nuts. I admit the blue ones make me giggle.


PuppidVelids

*Blue Ball Ohio has entered the chat* no, srsly look it up.


confluenza

Hang a vulva from a Volvo.


Kingkwon83

Or a Ford Clit Taurus


ephemeralkitten

When my sister did reverse drag her drag name was Clint Taurus.


JamesJakes000

Magnificent choice


Asatsuki

I once entered a contest as Mike Literus and the announcer said it


[deleted]

[удалено]


ephemeralkitten

I don't know what else to call it. I just think of drag as usually men dressing like extravagant women. My sis was a very accidentally butch person in general. Now he's my brother. :D It's funny cause for the first like 5 years of my son's life we really had to nail it in that Auntie was a girl, she just happened to look a lot like an average guy. Now 5 years after that he came around and is transitioning. He didn't choose Clint Taurus as his new name though... Lmao


[deleted]

[удалено]


thewineguy86

No, this was a fantastic joke.


I_love_pillows

What’s reverse drag


zxwut

They're called drag kings. Women dressing masculine, just the opposite idea of a drag queen.


THE_CENTURION

[Must be read in Gilbert Gottfrieds voice](https://youtu.be/XkLqAlIETkA)


kutsen39

Warning NSFW but holy hell is it glorious


perceptionactionprof

I bought mine from Pinkley Motors. Its a Pinkley Taurus


MesabiRanger

Never gonna see another Taurus car without hearing this! Dammit- I’m a Taurus too!


[deleted]

[удалено]


2-eight-2-three

>Hang a vulva from a Volvo. A little too boxy for my taste.


furygoat

Vulvo


Some_Belgian_Guy

Hang a weener from a Beemer


the_real_woody

The dicks are inside the beemers.


SkivvySkidmarks

What's the difference between a Porsche and a porcupine? A Porsche has the pricks on the inside.


Nox013Venom

And if i scrape my beemer's weener, does it classify as circumcised?


elmwoodblues

"I want this Volvo, Michael!"


LibertyAndFreedom

That's not a Volv*o*


buzrexo

Hang a wang from a ‘Stang.


stankyprincess

Do it and come back here and let us know the results. I too, might want to hang an inflatable vagina from my car.


69_queefs_per_sec

be careful where you park, some homeless dude might fuck it.


grptrt

> be careful where you park, some ~~homeless~~ dude might fuck it.


webdev2586

~~be careful where you park~~ some ~~homeless~~ dude will fuck it


Sneezium126

~~be careful where you park since homeless dude will~~ fuck ~~it~~


NotUrDinner

mid drive on the highway lmao


Nealon01

You don't know how right you are (or maybe you do): https://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/oza6wn/wtfucking_a_car (risky click)


69_queefs_per_sec

I have so many questions. * How did he cum from that? Exhaust pipes are 2 dicks wide easily. * Does the car need therapy? * Does the car owner need therapy? * Does the person filming need therapy? * Why was this being recorded even before he started? Does he do this every day at the same time?


TripperDay

And OF COURSE I was expecting a picture of a different dude fucking a different car.


rangeDSP

Same, you thinking of the one where it's like it's filmed from a second story building? Possibly somewhere in India?


TripperDay

Oh no there's more... I'm thinking of a guy in red lingerie looking directly into the camera with his dick in the exhaust pipe of a car. He looked far more comfortable than he should have. Edit: It's this one. https://imgur.com/r/ImagesOfBelgium/M7mO4I6


rangeDSP

For better or worse, that link doesn't work... I found mine though, somehow it's quite different to what I remembered but this is the one: https://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/676596/the_love_story_of_a_man_and_a_car/


momofeveryone5

WTF is with dudes fucking cars?!?!


VOODOO69692001

Desperate times call for desperate measures.


DiscFrolfin

*Desperate Pleasures


Justice_R_Dissenting

Title of your sex tape


JamesJakes000

Title of *our* sex tape


mightylonka

r/suddenlycommunist


myke113

Rule 34..?


JamesJakes000

Rule 35 ;)


PartTimeSassyPants

Ahh yeah, now we're talking. [That's my fetish](https://rule35.com/).


aZa0902

Risky click of the day.


Metallkiller

# Nine-nine!


JamesJakes000

99! *RIP*


handy333

Welp. The Red Army has entered the chat.


Setari

*Soviet Anthem plays*


BanginDrumsNMums

Ok, I'm in.


PartTimeSassyPants

Desperate Pleasures 6: Lowered sexpectations.


CrucifixAbortion

I haven't seen the first five, so I feel like I'd be totally lost.


HolstenerLiesel

found the lost Joy Division album


JudgeJebb

I'm not homeless


Fire_is_beauty

That's why put hot sauce inside.


strayjay50

Stick a bunch of pocket pussies to your car and drive it around like an ice cream truck


CatFoodBeerAndGlue

Thanks for the f-shack Love, Dirty Mike & The Boys


CaptainBignuts

r/blacksmith needs to know about this potential new burgeoning market.


crying_boobs

In some states truck nuts are illegal and classified as lewd bumper stickers. I don’t know which states


PhilHartmann

They also serve as a life ending projectile if they ever hit something hard enough to come loose.


fukato

Imagine getting killed by these nuts hitting your head. I would fucking laugh at my own death in my afterlife.


alt----f4

God : "you died of bofa"


AshIsRightHere

Guy: "what's bofa?"


Laser_hole

God: "haha got you!, I mean whats up dog?"


stabbymcshanks

Joe mama


_R-Amen_

Bofa deez nuts


rovoh324

*goes to Hell in a cool way*


gilimandzaro

Death by deez nuts HA


RedditIsNeat0

"You got hit by a toilet seat? That's nothing." -- You in the afterlife.


zombie_overlord

Helluva way to go. Lots of opportunity for a legendary epitaph though.


nutsyboltsy

We miss you, Phil.


Darkassassin07

I'd be awfully impressed if you managed to accelerate a pair of truck nuts to the point of injury in a car crash... Every pair I've seen is a soft rubber/foam type material. You'd have to get it going stupidly fast to be damaging, at that point the truck it's attached to is far more of a problem.


mr_never_lift

Could be missing some, but it looks like it is illegal in Florida, Virginia, Maryland, South Carolina


Kissedmysister

Can we alter our mufflers to look more like B holes?


bananainmyminion

Theres a video of people putting a fleshlight on a tail pipe that sounds pretty close, so we have the technology.


BleghMeisterer

People will fuck your car if you do this.


elmwoodblues

Theres a sub for that


Monarc73

r/rule34


rainbow227kitty

r/dragonsfuckingcars


tallbutshy

r/carsfuckingdragons


Darkassassin07

... People will fuck your car even if you don't do this.


servel333

Sure, but the risk goes way up if there's a human sex interface "built in"


gilimandzaro

[The video if anyone's interested](https://youtu.be/S_Y0dLTbISw)


IwuwH

Alright, I had no idea that would be so hilarious


TiagoTiagoT

This one isn't age restricted: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2VbaIK7JZcM


smeezy

If you do put anything on your exhaust tips make sure it can withstand high temperatures because I burned mys…I mean I read about it on Road & Track.


CreedFan2

Yes, but it would probably whistle as you drive, and wouldn’t get sufficient expulsion of exhaust fumes (the engine would “suffocate” because it couldn’t get the used up exhaust fumes out of the way fast enough). *However*, if you, say, make it more spread open like goatse, your vehicle should perform as well as it did before. ;)


SpaghettiMadness

Lawyer here. The line is drawn using a three pronged test called the Miller Test: 1. Whether the average person, applying “contemporary community standards", would find that the work, taken as a whole, appeals to the prurient interest (is it designed as pornographic in nature, essentially); 2. Whether the work depicts or describes, in a patently offensive way, sexual conduct or excretory functions specifically defined by applicable state law; and 3. Whether the work, taken as a whole, lacks serious literary, artistic, political, or scientific value.


momofeveryone5

So Georgia O'Keeffe orchids it is then!


Imma_Coho

Does it have to violate all 3 for it to be wrong or illegal?


threeimpossible

It’d be a social experiment to see how well people recognize female anatomy


skiprecap

What's a clit?


snilks

Coalition for the Liberation of Itinerant Tree-Dwellers.


CaptainFunktastic

[I AM THE CLIT COMMANDER](https://youtu.be/bB51NCcvuMs?t=66)


LatchedNipple

Imaginary thing my wife is always screeching about


May_I_inquire

my condolences to your wife


servel333

I also choose this guy's screeching wife. I'll draw you a map when I find it.


Madrigall

Came down here to say this, might be illegal to camoflauge your car in this manner. You'd be running over men left right and centre.


spawnADmusic

It's pretty much drawn where someone feels the need to report it, and some authority feels the need to reprimand you for it. That's how a lot of public obscenity issues play out in practice. That's why you'd probably get away with horrifying gory imagery on a band merch t-shirt, but wouldn't get permission to advertise it on a poster on the street.


EvidenceBasedSwamp

That's how porn was legalized in the 70s. They determined new York had no community standards for decency :)


FuckoffDemetri

Not wrong


rathat

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_know_it_when_I_see_it


Sweaty_Vacation

Towvaries! https://www.etsy.com/shop/Towvaries


donkeyrocket

I can't tell if the "child's art project" vibe increases or decreases the hilariousness of these.


nemosfuckedupfin

Giant inflatable vagina maybe not, because it would distract the fuck out of 100% of the drivers around you. But a reasonably sized novelty pussy superglued to your rear bumper would probably be fine


floatingwithobrien

I'm doing a model of the clitoris, like the whole thing, instead of the vulva. See how many people know what the fuck is up


Bubbilility

Lol, you probably can. I honestly don't see why you couldn't. It's tacky, but you do you.


richasalannister

“It’s tacky but you do you” is my life motto


camdanbakankedicik

It depends on where you put it. But technically, yeah it should be legal. I don't see why not unless it's too big to block the view.


tallbikefreak

I bought some little 3 inch disco balls online and hung a pair of them underneath my car that’s not fast. They ain’t truck nuts, it’s got disco balls


Joker4U2C

They're such big balls and they're fancy big balls.


TheWorldNeedsGuts

Hung under the car, they'll get dirty soon enough.


occasionaldrinker

Where would I get one of those ?


elmwoodblues

Car dealerships, used car lots, AutoTrader...sometimes you'll just see one on, like, the street with a sign


Krutoon

I've seen the female anatomy hanging from a car where I live. [truck uterus](https://imgur.com/a/lvSCGHY)


langecrew

Really though can we just not, and also get rid of the truck nuts too? It's been over ten years and I am _to this day still staggered_ by how psychotically stupid they are


Ovenproofcorgi

I think putting giant silicone boobs on the hood would be better


arcxjo

Then you'd need a car bra.


patiofurnature

People think that laws are black and white and things are either legal or illegal. That's not really how it works. There is no line to be drawn. A police officer might think both are fine, or they might think both are illegal. Everything is open to interpretation.


Wookieman222

I hate those idotic truck nuts.


Datathrash

If it was a cow vagina it would be exactly the same. Truck Nuts are supposed to be bull balls.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Mystic_Crewman

TIL that a car's gestational period is only 6 months.


AskMeAboutMyStalker

the "big inflatable" part might be the part that's troublesome. "truck nuts" are not big air filled decorations. They're only a couple inches long & appear to be rubber or silicone. If you did the equivalent w/ a vulva & clit, I don't see how that would cause any issues.


BreakfastTequila

A quick google search for your area about this will prob resolve it. Anything that extends past your rear bumper in my area needs a red flag attached. Lewd things, I have no idea. This is not legal advice.


Darkassassin07

So your saying... paint the pussy bright red before attaching it...


mrspikemike

But what will you call it? Truck Twat? The van clam? Hitch slit? Car box? Truck Muff?


heyoukidsgetoffmyLAN

Rubber bumper baby bunker


hispanicdude4

Some people hang the confederate flag on the back of their trucks. So just go ahead and do it.


KruNCHBoX

You can do it but you won’t have the balls


TriGurl

The line is typically drawn down the middle for a vagina…


redref1ux

I would say it's not a crime, but why would you want to?


simcity4000

You know that I ain't braggin', she's a real pussy wagon


ButterYourShit

Uh, yeah. But that would just make you equally as dull


Saldar1234

It is more apt as a metaphor too. You want your truck to seem and be tough. Ready for work and getting stuff done. Well, testicles are incredibly fragile and delicate. Even a light flick on those things can completely disable their owner. Whereas a vagina is built to take a literal pounding and keep working. No tougher part of the human anatomy.


fuck-off-i-dont-care

All body parts should be legal. Its fucking body parts. Why is nudity such a big fucking deal? I swear, people will be dressing their pets before long, because their dogs dick is exposed. Think of the children!


haddock420

There was a Sprite ad in the UK a few years ago that went viral because it showed a dog swimming and they put a big black censor bar over the dog's genitals.


elmwoodblues

If it overhangs the back of the vehicle you're supposed to tie a red rag to it. So...


rhill2073

Patent it and sell it!! There's already a legal battle for who owns the IP to truck nuts.


Thrgd456

Only if your truck is also a Prius


StockyNerd74

Are you trying to “get back” at the people with truck nuts? Those kind of people would find the truck vagina hilarious. I really don’t think it’s the statement I’m assuming you think it is


DoNotTrustMyWord

They’re cow’s nuts. Mostly cattle farmers hang these on their trucks, at least where I am from. Hang a cow pussy from your car.


AnonNo9001

honestly I think it'd just be funnier if you shoved a fleshlight into the trailer hitch receptacle.


troyvestarino

Truck nuts=bull not human, right? Cow vagina?


ikkonoishi

Yes. Also Yes. It isn't.


A_solo_tripper

Freedom of speech


8426578456985

They make truck vaginas that slide into a 2” receiver, so sure.


calafragilistic

If it ever deflates you're gonna be draggin flaps


fzammetti

And suddenly, that Pussy Wagon from Kill Bill takes on a whole new meaning.


Rocknocker

No, but if you drive a hybrid, it's already implied.


Cart9739

#WHAT IN TARNATION-


Totally_PJ_Soles

Probably one of those things where you'll get a ticket and if you say "what about the truck nuts I see?" they'll be like "yeah those guys should get tickets too.". But they'll never issue them.


fixit858

You could, but the testicle guys would never find it.


thomasbrakeline

The clit is only enlarged when the truck is turned n.


Predated_Ash

Hang some realistic looking fake testicles then, see how fake we can go before we cross the line