By - SCARE-O-DACTYL
>i'm a 19 year old, depressed, unhealthily thin, politically moderate music producer.
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When you come out of the closet as a gay pirate wannabe boy band member who's taking longer to hit puberty than beiber did
Pirates are *in* this year.
They are nothing but Pirates, but pirates but pirates.
I'm gay and this is too gay for me
When you get pulled over for "random" searches at the airport, I bet the first place they check is your nose.
I'm guessing they go straight for the rubber glove...
You look like the [emo Muslim](https://youtu.be/MuPRagPTXU0) from Family Guy.
that is fucking racist, as a Muslim I feel offended
not very cool
You can't be that serious and wear a paperclip for an earing. It's one or the other.
does the fact that it's a swarovski paperclip help or am i now more gay?
Well, you can't be more ugly, so go with gay emo wannabe.
Gayer than the woman’s strapon she uses on your mum on your birthday
Black nails to fool men at the glory hole.
this one's my favorite
If you were any uglier, I might have a few shots just to fuck you. In the ass. Just how you like it.
Is... is this a roast?
seriously, how jealous is your moustache of your eyebrows?
You had self esteem prior to posting that?
yeah, what self esteem?
Does your mom know that you borrow her high heels also?
Once college fails, you can be used as a chimney sweep
i'm trying to pursue a music career so being a chimney sweep is closer than you think
Your Participation Award is being withheld. Turns out we have standards after all.
If Sean the sheep turned emo
You have Osama bin ladin's bastard son face
man i guess i really do look middle-eastern hahaha
I don't know what's more unpleasant:
The fact Freddie Mercury is dead
James Charles is 21
Or that their love child is on Reddit
this was meant to be a roast but i take this as an absolute win
Wet towel with JUST enough homo-pirate swag to stop people from completely ignoring your existence altogether.
Self esteem? The shocker is that you have any left
You have self asteem left? This is an accomplishment by itself
I’d try but your doing a good job yourself bud 👍
You look like a cross between. Capt jack sparrow and Mr. Gibbs.
You look like the white, heroin addicted version of the Artist Formerly Known As Prince. Good luck kicking the habit!
Your a 10, but a long way from 100.
Promote your sound cloud raps somewhere else.
Why would you choose that wig to hide your alopecia?
You look like the result of John Mayer’s shit after a meth binge
Your def broke and your girlfriends cheating on you.
Well she’s mad he’s been stealing her nail polish
Who put Timothée Chalamet on crack?
You should seriously get your money back from whomever it was you paid to Photoshop that hair and mustache into your picture.
It should be enough roasting every time you go out in public... How dare you show that mug outside!
The artist formerly known as Prince without the artist and the prince
Gay, Prince loving emo kid.... Who's Mexican
You look like somebody crossed Freddie Mercury with a chocolate poodle
Hold up. I didn’t think members of isis were allowed to be roasted on here. Oh right, this is a “we roasted you now you roast us”. Nice.
Not a roast but I literally look like the black version of you
johnny dep if he was indian
You look like yoir wearing a snapchat filter
If the artist formerly known as Prince, the one with the symbol, had taken a shit - which then died and left a ghost shit version of itself, it would have a brighter looking life ahead of it than you.
Looks like someone forgot to wash their hands after fisting their boyfriend again
You look like that one kid in school who just kind of exists, people see you in the hallway and maybe in a classroom but you dont do anything noteworthy, you’re just there and if you disappeared no one would notice
this is actually spot on
There should be a brand of toilet paper with your face on it because you look soft as fuck
So that’s where my poodle went to
Mate I’m all honesty are you a boy?
if you're genuinely curious then yes
The result of an unfortunate coupling between the World's Ugliest Groupie and the Artist Formerly Known As Prince.
Bird's nest for hair caterpillar for eyebrows and there's something about Mary jizz on your ear?
Your dad really did fuck you senseless
If Freddy Mercury and Jack Sparrow had a love child
I'm not even gonna roast ya. I just want to know exactly what the fuck is on your lip?
Semen. Aged semen.
The only thing that appears to be darker than your nails is your soul.
"No I'm not addicted to crack, I just look like a corpse and spend ⅔ of my paycheck on it every month!"
You look like you're on the run from a family that would stone you to death if you were out, and want to change your name to an unpronounceable symbol.
Anal Q-tip. Used.
Who the fuck uses QTips in the ass?
You look like Prince but gayer
Has it ever been full to the brim?
If a ball sack wore an earring.
Look at that fucking birds nest!
You look like a stint in jail would probably knock the Post Malone right out of you.
Aline your life, because your nose never will.
You look like you went back in time to sexually molest yourself.
You’ll find your self-esteem out in left field next to whatever manhood you have left.
Emo muffin ?
Did you mean shatter is what gives you what self esteem you have left?
Did you want a dangly earring or did you not have any better ideas to hide your coke spoon?
Looks like whiteboy Rick fucked Chris Cornell’s corpse
Listen Shatter, self esteem is kept on the right! we gotta get you Normal!
Wait.. why did you bowlcut and tease a doll hair wig? Looks like you broke a Keychain and hung it on your ear , anyway, chop your weird arms off .. then you'd be normal.
So the top of your head is that farm poodles go to when they die.
Put down the nail polish and pick up a set of hair clippers
You look like your catch phrase is “Rohypnol anyone?”
This screams "all my friends are girls"
Surprised you had any self esteem before posting this.
When your nail polish is straighter than your nose
if your music is any reflection of you then I don't want to hear it....
[it's not what you'd expect i think](https://open.spotify.com/track/5dlQbARLtkYyEHkWAUDMkQ?si=8faB7oMWRKmmBdTG1OuQiQ)
You look like the kinda person who’d say their corpse to get a egirl to ruin your life
are you trying to be a fuccboi or a metrosexual gay man, decide on one pls
Like your picture shattered my screen? No thanks.
Fuck of Seagulls
The confidence you have when your dad films your tik toks must be skyrocketing.
Have you looked in the mirror?
You look like a gay version of Jack Sparrow
Is your Dad the Jesus from The Big Lebowski?
Ok failed impressionist of Travis Scott
I hope your parents kick up the heat at night so you don’t freeze in the basement.
You had any left by this point?
There are ways to get noticed without having to be weird
You must not have ya dad cause them hispanic fathers dont play this shit
This is the definition of bisexual
A Kerry Eurodyne that will never be romanced.
MF wanna be goth so bad he colored his nails in with a sharpie
Every single feature on your face is a mistake
I'm amazed you had any self esteem to begin with
You can call yourself a music producer when you earn money from it. And your mom buying your album doesn't count.