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Best day at my crappy retail job as a teenager was when a guy came in looking for some fleece fabric. I asked what kind and he said, "Well, it's not actually for me, it's for this guy," and turned out a small material pouch. A joey somersaulted out, stood up and started checking the place out. Cutest little thing.
When I was young my family hand raised a Joey as his mum was hit by a car. He would climb into anything resembling a pouch.
My mum used old woollen jumpers and stitched the bottom closed. We then hung then from door handles around the house for him to rest in, he loved them!
That's honestly adorable. I'm glad he's got a nice sanctuary life as a good stud boy.
What happened in the end? Did you release him when he got bigger?
He went to a better place...
By which I mean he went to an animal sanctuary where he was put in with about 20 females and was the only male!
So he's now living his best life!
Unless he’s gay
We are talking about roos not swans
Hey, could be giraffes we're not talking about too. They gave a ton of gay sex
Look I think we should just look at giraffes with their 12 foot long weird neck arteries and their ability to aim from that height at all.
Leave swans out of this
Death by kangersnu
How cute! I assume you're in Australia, yeah? Because I think the Wow factor is like a whole lot higher if it happened somewhere other than AUS
"Yea this little guy jumped into my underwear while I was shitting at the airport, so I just smuggled him out in my pants!"
Is that an exotic species or are you happy to see me?
Yes, he is exotic. I call him Joey. Here's a photo of him next to the kangaroo.
por que no los dos?
Brilliant, made me lol
"And when customs asked me if I happened to be smuggling a juvenile kangaroo out of the country by concealing it in my pants, I just smiled and said thank you very much."
I'd just smile and give you a Vegemite sandwich, but to each their own.
Service kangaroos would be awesome. Wish you could train them for those types of things. Imagine having a service animal that would also box the shit outta some jackass trying to fuck with you.
1. Go to Florida
2. Get Service gator
3. That's it. Mission accomplished.
I trained Boxxy to do just that.
or you'll end up in kangaroo court
I once appraised a house with indoor kangaroos, in SW Missouri. People be crazy.
God I hope they were actually wallabies. A fucking full size eastern grey in a house would be a VERY small house indeed...
I wish they had been.
*edited to add, I am a huge animal lover and am pretty good at recognizing species, these were red kangaroos.
The wow factor would still be high AUS.
This brings me so much joy
How you doin.
Stop fucking the kangaroos.
Heard this in Jar Jar's voice
Is that you, Uncle Joey?
Cut. It. Out.
"How roo doin'?" - Joey
His pants now.
Yeah I don’t think I’d pull those back up to my crotch
Good point. I guess I’m realistically dumping the joey out, taking off my underwear, and just pulling my shorts up and going commando
“Hmm, smells like balls in here.” - Joey
Snug as a bug in a rug.
Snug as a 'roo when you poo
Is that a kangaroo in your pants or are you happy to see me
On that note... what do you think the inside of a kangaroo's pouch smells like?
Apparently like this guy's underwear.
Perfect!!!! Thanks for making me laugh!
Like a gamey leather
Strange but true: it smells like when the Scholastic Book Fair would come to your school.
This got a laugh out of me gosh damn it
If someone tells me that there's a kangaroo in his underpants, i wouldn't believe it and is lying. But fuck me im so wrong.🙃
That's adorable but Idk if I'd want something with claws that close to my exposed nuts.
You got that right! Why the hell does he have a roo in bathroom in the 1st place?
I mean, I know it's Australia, but still
They can open doors you know?
I know Alan grant says raptors turned into birds. But I think they turned in kangaroos.
I'd see a fight between a jacked up kangaroo and a raptor.
Pretty sure you can in at least a couple of the Tekken games.
I was jerking off and a kitten attacked where all the motion was and kicked the hell out of my balls.
Orgasmed. Didn’t care.
Huh, didn't think this would be a response to a comment about Tekkin, but here we are.
There's probably an Ark mod for that!
What would you need a mod for? Both exist in the base game.
That little squirt? Damn!
They're that smart?
A lot of animals are smarter then we give them credit for.
Maybe not with a lot of finesse, but yeah they can figure out a door after a few tries. If it was a weird handle or way of opening maybe not, but just a knob or push handle then yeah give it a few tries and it’ll eventually get it
Rough recall of an american park ranger quote on the topic of bear proof garbage bins:
*There is a lot of intellectual overlap between the smartest bear and the dumbest tourist*
I’ve literally seen it in Alberta when on vacation.
Tourist that was in the same hotel, could not figure out the bear proof dumpster and left trash by it. 30mins later a bear shows up, rips apart the trash bag then opens up the dumpster and has a grand old time lol
Seen bears in Minnesota open car doors and rummage through looking for candy bars and lost french fries. Sounds cute but it was scary AF. And, if you lock your doors and they smell food, they'll just rip them off.
And a lot of humanity is dumber than we choose to admit. You doubt my words? Work support for a shift.
I work for a military, my current position is doing IT support for my unit because i’m releasing and they needed a guy to fill the spot for a few months.
My god, born in the 90s, I grew up with computers and understood their importance at a young age. As well the security concepts with protecting your information online.
The amount of younger members coming through that have no concepts of password security or basic computer concepts blows my mind.
I never thought i’d need to train a 20yr old on how to send an email in my life
Just. Damn. You know what, I can't do it from here ...or I'd buy you a round in sympathy. I'm pretty sure some of these people got their idea of a secure password by watching Spaceballs years ago.
"What a coincidence, that's the same code as my luggage!"
Part of my job is doing spot inspections. It’s really concerning when i turn over a COs or SSMs keyboard and i see the simplest password on a post it note
Like last week it happened again, Officer cleared out of our unit and i had to setup the office for an incoming OC. Flip the keyboard over to check for damages and their login and password is right there.
Like come on, just do better
A roo in the loo
My cat does this.
I was gonna say…the answer in 99% of these cases is: It’s Australia.
That's your answer.... Its Australia.
They keep the snakes, spiders, crocodiles, sharks, dingoes, etc away
Kangaroo joeys are very clingy! They are one of the most labour-intense native animals for rescuers and rehabilitators to hand raise because they need a lot of body contact, a lot of reassurance and affection. They don't do well without it, and can get very stressed and not thrive, basically. So a wildlife rehabber having the joey in the bathroom with then is not that unusual.
Do you not keep your nuts in the bowl?
I keep mine in a jar of pickled eggs if that helps?
No they usually sway just a couple inches above the floor.
I wouldn’t want to put my nuts into pants that a wild animal was getting germs on.
I’m sure wild animals aren’t thrilled about rolling around on your skid marks either.
Or are they
You shit, I sit
Mom, you need to wash your pouch. It smells like ass
I’ve never wondered what they do in the pouch all day until now. They just scratch themselves and nap?
Like crawling into a fleshy hammock
No but they do shit in their mothers pouches and the mom cleans it out with her tongue
Wot de fok?
We all know that feeling.
“The world sucks and I just want to go back to being a kid where people will take care of me.”
Hey you got something in your underroos
I keep hearing about all these brands coming out with men's pouch underwear. Is this what they're talking about?
Hurry joe tell the manager there’s a Joey in the John getting inside Jonny’s pants. Geez Jenny, that’s the janitor’s job!
this can happen in Texas also, just usually an armadillo or a Ford F150
How has no one mentioned that he's in what is assumed to be a public bathroom with some liquid on the floor, and he's in his SOCK's!
If it were a cat, this would fit in r/catsinpants
There really is a subreddit for everything, and I'm here for it.
I know what I have to do but I don’t know if I have the strength to do it
I honestly think it should be cross posted regardless
Kangoroos are probably Australian cats I dunno
more like r/mensfeetandunderwear
I read that as "cat sin pants"
interesting that 99% of photos are white dudes with hairy legs. almost as if all other types of legs are too shy to post such pic online.
Poo with a roo.
I call bullshit. That doesnt look like the ceiling. You guys are suppose to be upside down.
I call double call double bullshit because there aren't enough things in frame that could easily kill a man. Where's all the car-sized spiders and drop bears?
Obviously the spider is under the toilet seat waiting for the right moment to strike.
Actually the guy taking a shit is a spider
I'm sitting in the toilet as I read this. Made me clench my hole shut.
The spider will just make a new hole.
Why do you think the clip is so short? Drop bear probably landed on him...
As for the spiders you're a bit off, they arent all that big, in fact *most* deadly spiders could fit under the toilet seat and youd never know until they bit your balls.
Tell me you've never been to Australia without saying you've never been to Australia.
Obviously we put flooring tiles on the ceiling, or our boots would ruin it.
*smirk with nose exhale*
Just the nose. No mouth.
wait til it wants some milk while in the pouch
Ha! I love r/catsinpants
I had no idea we needed an r/roosinpants
Welp...guess your it's mommy now
Dropping off a dingy and this happens. Worse then someone knocking on the door.
"It smells like sweaty balls in here, Mom!"
If that happened to me, I'd still be in the bathroom with my panties around my ankles. Until that sweet baby decided to leave or until it grew up.
Open Door policy, I see
Why is no one asking how an animal got into the bathroom?? What if it wasn’t a cute animal? Don’t like 75% of animals in Australia have a method to kill you?
That includes the cute ones...
Clearly you see it hiding waiting for him to pull his shorts up
Waiting to pounce...
& kangaroos too, because if the mother is nearby, he's dead.
Oh that cute animal is getting into a comfy position to punch his balls out,that’s why the video stopped abruptly…the guys ded
It looks like a public restroom. Oftentimes the door is propped open during the day.
This is why I’m scrolling comments. How “typical” is this really? Do Roos just get into public restrooms on occasion?
I saw a video a couple months ago of a larger one walking into a bar, but the bathroom should be closed off right? How’d a Joey get in?
It’s a joke, no one really thinks this is typical.
OP probably works at a zoo or animal rehab facility, m8.
So the thing about Australians is that we think it’s hilarious to fuck with people.
Many years ago, in 1997 or so, my Aussie friend told me about drop bears. I did a web search for them (I wonder what I used? Lycos? Altavista?), skeptical, and a *goddamn Australian government* website confirmed they existed. You bastards and your drop bears.
Why not a Joey? Just because we call it a John doesn’t mean it’s exclusive!
Experienced pickpocketer right there. Check your pockets, and his too!
I believe he's wearing Underoos
At least it makes sense when joeys do it
How come there's a budgie in here already?!
The lesson here is never pull your pants down in Australia
More wholesome than I was expecting. Was waiting for a giant spider to appear and ruin everything.
'I wanna sleep mommy'
That a kangaroo in your pants or you just happy to see me?
Congrats,now you have kangaroo for a dick
When I stayed in Australia the girls found a snake in their bathroom. Wasn’t nearly as cuddly.
That’s a Kangapoo
"Joey got in my pants" is a great excuse for how you gave your girl the clap.
*Pulls pants up* "Crikey theres a 'roo in me underdaks!"
“Ugh, this pouch smells like balls.”
That is the testiculosoler, it's like the chupacabra, but instead of sucking goat blood this australian version hunts the scent of unshaved balls...
So frackin cute
Ok that’s awesome 👏 😄
The loo roo strikes again
"What's wrong with your pouch?"
"I like yours better"
Based in the title and the small screen, thought the bulbous hairy thing at the beginning of the video was something else for a second and was very concerned.
Crikey! Look at the size of that didgeridoo!
Are kangaroo infestations common in Aussie homes?
All fun and games till the little dude thinks your dong is a nip.
The one time saying "Joey saw my dick" ain't gay
Damn you guys got Kangaroos in your bathrooms? What do you use them for?
Ait little man if you wanna play like this you are going to my ass
If he shits, I sits?
I think this means they guy has to give the kangaroo his house now.
Really caught you with your pants down, didn’t it?
Weird kink but, you do you.
I didn’t know my cat was Australian.
All fun and games until it judo kicks him in the bean bag..
It's simple. I see a pouch. I climb in.
This would be a shitty way to find out you're allergic to kangaroos
It's that a joey in your pants it are you just happy to see me.
What? You made a pouch.
Is that a wallaby in your pants, big boy?
Seems as good a pouch as any. I like the cut of this kid's jib
Pull it up, no balls
No amount of convincing in the world will make me believe this isn’t every day in Australia
Replace kangaroo with kitten or puppy for the rest of the world.
I have so many questions; why don’t you have shoes on? Why is there a kangaroo in the bathroom? Why do you need to drop the pants all the way down?
Wear a thong. Problem solved.
We're talking about Australians, that means something completely different.
Wearing a flip-flop as underwear doesn't sound comfortable, but then I've never tried so who am I to judge.