T O P

LGBTQ+ Mega Thread

LGBTQ+ Mega Thread

Wismuth_Salix

I didn’t want to make a sticky, I swear. **If you are here to post about how much you don’t like Pride month - stop, scroll down, realize that like 20 fucking people have already done that since the thread refreshed 15 hours ago, and join one of those discussions. We do not need 2 dozen identical complaints.** (And people wonder why Megathreads are necessary.)


SouthernYoghurt9

People over 18 identifying as demigirls and demiboys is cringe. You're an adult now. You're a woman or man, not a girl or boy at that age. Adults self infantalizing is creepy


violetdragons

Imagine giving a fuck about what another person identifies with.. couldn’t be me


Wismuth_Salix

Not really their fault that nobody uses the terms demiman or demiwoman.


Kongo204

Why does age necessarily change someone's gender?


belowthemask42

I think they meant they “boy” and “girl” endings to the sexualities somehow make it so when adults use them it’s “infantilizing”


violetdragons

It’s not even a sexuality though. [Demigirl ](https://gender.wikia.org/wiki/Demigirl) and [demiboy](https://gender.wikia.org/wiki/Demiboy) are gender identities.


JustAGamer14

Suppose we should stop using the term boyfriend and girlfriend


belowthemask42

Yeah that’s why the first guy’s point is pretty stupid. To be very clear I don’t agree with him in the slightest lmao.


DiplomaticRogue

If I see a trans girl get called a trap one more time, I will kill the CEO of anime. I'm serious here, if you value your catgirls you better stop misgendering trans people.


ohay_nicole

Naruto running won't save your CEO!


SouthernYoghurt9

Self ID is dumb. I know an MTF who claims to be cis, because she went through full medical transition. She says she is cis because her sex and gender both align as female. She's still trans though. Self ID doesn't make someone whatever they claim to be automatically


Kongo204

I thought the concept of self ID was that a trans person wouldn't need something like a medical diagnosis to be able to be legally trans?


SouthernYoghurt9

Googeling it, I'm not getting anything like that. There really isnt a concept of being "legally trans" anyway


Kongo204

The ability to do things like change your gender in government documentation.


[deleted]

[удалено]


SouthernYoghurt9

This is a purely online complaint. Idk what people do irl, I just want to point out that it is technically not true


gaycheesecake

Oh yeah, there’s a lot that’s “technically not true” like, my hair color example. People lie about their age, weight, height, achievements, etc. all the time and it doesn’t make it true so I don’t see it as any different.


That_one_fucking_boi

People who call pride and pride month dumb, especially because "no one cares if you're gay," fundamentally don't get pride. ​ To preface, I'm not calling you homophobic for not understanding pride month nor am I saying that you have to actively fight for gay rights. Education about LGBTQ history is hard to come by accidentally and fighting for rights is an emotionally taxing commitment that shouldn't make you feel ashamed if you aren't up for it. I think the easiest way to sum up the issue with the "No one cares if you're gay" argument, outside of the fact that many, many people do, is that pride is the reason for that. Without the gay rights movement, (more) people would care that I'm gay, and more than likely harm me for it. Pride was started by gay and trans people decades ago fed up of being told that they were wrong. That their existence was a sin. Pride then was their way of standing up to a world that hated them, and pride now is still that and more. Again, back to the fact that homophobic people do exist, pride is both a way to humanize gay people, (Humanization is often cited as the reason ex-homophobes came around,) and let LGBTQ people in majorly homophobic situations have hope and know they aren't wrong or 'sinful'. But, let's take off our first-world binoculars and take a look at how the the world perceives LGBTQ people. > Out of 195 countries, roughly 70 criminalize homosexual acts between men and 43 between homosexual acts between women or men, 12 of those imposing a death penalty. Out of 195 countries, roughly 40 refuse to let you change your legal gender, (which can in turn punish trans people for being in heterosexual relationship since the law views them as their gender assigned at birth,) 15 outlaw dressing in accordance with your gender identity. Of course, legalization is the bare minimum for LGBTQ rights. Even though you couldn't be prosecuted for being gay in the US for decades, only 6 years ago could you get married in the eyes of the law. And, of course, even in the most LGBTQ friendly countries, hate crimes are still committed due to slow/nonexistent cultural change. But how does this affect Pride? Simply put, it puts on blast how we in LGBTQ friendly countries refuse to sit idly by while people just like us across the world are being jailed and killed. TL;DR: Change didn't come out of thin air.


Altiondsols

Please, for the love of god, stop making new flags just to have them. It defeats the purpose of flags as a whole when you have so many that they’re all unrecognizable, but especially the purpose of the Gilbert Baker flag (the rainbow one) in uniting the community across ideas not specific to any one identity. If you’re a member of an underrepresented identity/microlabel and you don’t feel like the Gilbert Baker flag represents you, so you want to make your own to put on your Instagram page or take to Pride events, knock yourself out. I’m really talking about the few dozen hideous blue-turquoise-green flags for MLM, a group with literally zero reason to not feel represented by the half-century-old Gilbert Baker flag. At that point, the goal isn’t representation, it’s segregation. It’s just asinine that we went from gays and lesbians marching together under one flag in the 70’s, to a blue flag for boys and a pink flag for girls.


VedDdlAXE

I agreed until you got to the MLM flag. I like that there's an MLM flag now (though there doesn't have to be tons of them). It shows MLM as an individual identity like Lesbian (WLW) instead of putting them exclusively in the Rainbow flag that shluld be for the whole community.


Altiondsols

If you don’t agree with me on the MLM flag, which part did you agree with in the first place?


VedDdlAXE

the idea that we don't need a flag for every small difference. MLM is very broad. It's just Gay Man. Some flags are very specific


Altiondsols

If it’s a flag for a group that doesn’t feel represented by the mainstream LGBT community and the Gilbert Baker flag, I don’t care, make a new flag. But flags have always represented communities, not identities. That’s why we didn’t just get the trans flag back in the 90’s, but also flags for subcultures like the leather pride flag. The reason there hasn’t been an MLM flag for fifty years isn’t because no one knew gay men existed, or we just forgot for five decades, it’s because we didn’t need one. There is no separate community of gay and bi men distinct from the rest of the LGBT community, and hence no separate flag.


Lukoisbased

the rainbow flag represents the community as a whole. the more specific flags are just there so you immediately know what letter of the LGBTQ+ community someone is. if i just use the rainbow one, nobody knows if im trans or bisexual or gay or a lesbian. but if i use a more specific flag everyone will know. imagine a gay trans man who is pre-T and therefore doesnt pass perfectly yet, if he used the rainbow flag a lot of people would just assume hes a butch lesbian, but if he used the mlm/gay flag people would know that hes a man and gay


Doryfunk222

The colors on the flags don't actually represent anything. They were chosen at random and then assigned a meaning later.


Altiondsols

I don’t agree that flags are supposed to convey every minute detail of your identity. It’s not a nametag.


Lukoisbased

i mean if you dont like that you dont have to use these specific flags and can use the rainbow one. i just dont see why you care if other people create flags for their sexuality or gender


Altiondsols

I care because it divides the community that I am a part of?


Lukoisbased

ive never seen that happen tbh, like yeah sometimes people have specific spaces cause of their identities but its not cause of the flags.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Kongo204

Repeating the same, tired, transphobic joke and you're trying not to be labeled a transphobe? You act like you're trying to speak with nuance but all you're doing is complaining about trans people trying not to be misgendered. When no one is upset when someone makes a genuine mistake. Man, all of this is just the same shit as straights who want gay people to hide their sexuality. You're right that the community *can* be toxic. There are major problems that need to be addressed. But that's not what you just did.


VedDdlAXE

The guy basically said "Guys before you say I'm (bunch of horrible things unrelated to being gay) and homophobic, don't worry! I'm gay! So I can't be a Racist, Sexist Incel! Because Gay people can't be Misogynistic or hate POC! Duhhhh!" at the start so can you really expect a valid argument


Kongo204

Yeah, it was very /r/asablackman


Sablemint

> they screech if you accidentally misgender them No they don't. If you ever decide to post anything like that, just save everyone's time and say "I'm lying."


ohay_nicole

The 1980’s Ford Mustang steering wheel comment sounds backhanded gatekeepery. I agree we could all be better for each other, though.


FireLordObama

Just because I’m not straight doesn’t mean people get to decide my opinions for me. The fact that I don’t 100% align with the typical LGBT political agenda has got me in hot water more times then I can count.


HowSalty

Is this hot water from the lgbt community themselves? Because I agree with you, if you don’t align to their guidelines, you will most likely be shunned, or at the very least, picked on.


Kongo204

Wanna be specific?


Sablemint

Apparently not XD


Kongo204

Yeah, for all we know they oppose shit like gay marriage. That vagueness is useless.


JustAGamer14

"omg people are suppressing my opinions on lgbt people!!! 1!1! Such snowflakes" "oh what were your opinions and views?" " "


nanowrimoboi

People complaining about companies using pride are missing the point. Like yeah, no shit they're doing that, they do that with everything, as long as it makes them the most money. The thing is, supporting the LGBT+ community being what makes them the most money is really important in terms of the normalization/integration of LGBT+ culture and acceptance. Being part of 'what makes corporations the most money' is a huge step forward in widespread casual acceptance and hopefully causes some cognitive dissonance for those who are still bigots.


Altiondsols

Certainly feel free to celebrate it as a step forward for acceptance, but also realize that you’re treating corporations as simply a barometer for public opinion - meaning they don’t deserve any recognition or praise.


CultureTroll

"Man" and "woman" are the two binary genders. If you say you are a non-binary man or woman, I've got to assume you are either cis or an idiot. Fyi, I'm genderfluid and I'm tired of idiots and cis people making us look like a joke. NB shouldn't be so hard to understand that even other trans people throw their hands up and give up


VedDdlAXE

Demiboys and Demigirls land on the Agender Spectrum.


Bas1cVVitch

https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Non-Binary_Man https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Non-Binary_Woman Assuming NB men and NB women are cis is patently ridiculous. For starters, lots of people who have these identities *have* medically transitioned.


CultureTroll

I said they are either cis or dumb. Elliot page is definitely actually trans


elementgermanium

Some non-binary people are somewhat close to a binary gender on the spectrum. 0.9 is between 0 and 1 after all. “Close-to-man” is just longer and more unwieldy.


CultureTroll

This post isn't about femme and masc enbies, it's about enbies straight up identifying as a binary gender


elementgermanium

They’re not. It’s shorthand. If you picture it as a spectrum and replace the binary genders with, say, 0 and 1 for the sake of example, it’s like rounding 0.9 to 1. The actual value is still 0.9, so they’re non-binary, but in casual conversation, it’s close enough to round to 1.


CultureTroll

But then they would just say "I'm a man" or "I'm a woman", because "nonbinary woman" is as long or longer than "nonbinary" or "woman" or even "nonbinary femme" no? I can totally see a trans masc enby just telling their shitty southern family they are a trans man to make it simple, but that's not what we are talking about here.


violetdragons

Thank you. I just had some weirdo in this thread calling me cis because I’m a demigirl. How gross.


CultureTroll

Your profile says "woman". So if you are a AFAB identifying as a woman... you're not trans. That's not even an unpopular opinion LOL


VedDdlAXE

Once again. It says Non-Binary Woman (Demigirl) Because many Demigirls identify as Non-Binary (the Demi aka Agender-ish side for simplicity), and Woman (the Girl side of Demigirl). Therefore a Non-Binary Woman would be a Demigirl (most of the time) and are on the Agender Spectrum


CultureTroll

It could say meat-eating vegetarian and you can still only be one of the two. Is she trans age too, because last time I checked only 14 year olds were doing this cringe larp as trans thing. What 21 year old woman is identifying as a "girl"?


VedDdlAXE

That's a dumb concept because Vegetarian is a person who doesn't eat meat. Therefore a meat eating Vegetarian contradicts itself. A woman is not "a person who is not Non-Binary" and has no distinct definition against being Non-Binary. Demigirls can identify as NB Girls


CultureTroll

Now you are catching on. A nonbinary person is someone who doesnt identify as one of the two binary genders. So someone who does *not* identify as a man or woman


VedDdlAXE

Correct. A Non-Binary Woman is a Demigirl, not a woman. But they can call themself a Non-Binary Woman because not everyone knows what Demigirl is and its still correct


chekeymonk10

username checks out


ohay_nicole

Isn’t this basically what truscum say about gender fluid folks?


CultureTroll

No, truscum say you have to have dysphoria to be trans. That doesn't really require believing any particular type of enby isn't real since enbies can have dysphoria


Altiondsols

Truscum ideology is... bizarre and complicated. The party line is “you need dysphoria to be trans”, but they really mean “binary trans people who medically transition in the way I approve of are valid, and anyone else is a trender.” They completely ignore that plenty of nonbinary people have dysphoria and many binary trans people who medically transition don’t have it. Also, they treat dysphoria as if it were a congenital disease, something with exactly one presentation that you either experience for your entire life in a rigid, uniform way, or you don’t have at all.


CultureTroll

As much as they hate umbrellas, "truscum" seems to be an umbrella term for a whole bunch of specific clans. I don't know much about their internal politics though


Wismuth_Salix

It basically boils down to “nobody but me is valid”. Truscum are basically TER~~F~~s with dysphoria.


Josephe_Krakowski

Corporations aren't your friends. I don't care company didn't do a rainbow flag profile pic. Only reason they do is for the money gullible idiots give it and its now to normal if they don't indulge it they're homophobic. I know why they're willing to acknowledge my existence in june. Because I'm a minority who'll buy their shit in rainbow. I don't want my sexuality to be used as free advertising ffs


VedDdlAXE

Company (aka entity of work that produces products/content for monetary gain) does thing for money? WOWWWWW I did not know that!


elementgermanium

Corporations will use anything and everything for advertising, it’s not new. It’s like calling out a weather vane for pointing downwind. But what it does mean is that sane people are now more profitable to pander to than homophobes and thus a majority in society. It’s an indicator of how far we’ve come.


Altiondsols

if that’s your takeaway, corporations still aren’t doing anything “good” by supporting pride - certainly they don’t deserve any praise or attention for just making the most profitable decision at the time. it might indicate changing opinions, but it’s the opinions of the market, not the corporations.


Kongo204

Yes, we know. Half the comments here are either "DAE rainbow capitalism bad?" Or "What if corporate pandering good actually?"


ajbdbds

Someone once told me in response to why we have pride "then why don't you all grab rifles and go fight the oppressors in those countries?" Like yes that was my plan personally, but mentalities like that are another reason we still need pride


Chronoset1

if ive learned anything, violence is a solution. it is fast and effective, but only for a time. the society will return to its initial if not worse state given the time. the only real thing that changes people is education, education over generations. but for that to happen there has to be cooperation. so we need to expand knowledge and connection to more people, teach them how to discern fact from fiction, and lighten the problems that they experience. pretty hard to convince a group of people should stop throwing others off roofs if the one telling them stop are the reason you don't have food to eat


Jessielieb12

Neopronouns are totally valid (I hate the word valid because it’s become such a buzzword but I can’t think of a different phrasing) The first proposal of neopronouns was in 1890 with the idea of the “thon” pronoun set And if you don’t like the idea of neopronouns as pronouns just think of them as nicknames or something idk most neo users have multiple pronoun sets you can use.


Vegetable-Dirt-6735

The fact that we have large corporations supporting a progressive agenda is a huge step in the right direction, even if they are doing it for the money. To be able to voice support for LGBTQ on these large platforms shows the homophobic half of America that there is a change happening and that that the power is in the people. All this complaining is only going to backfire with companies showing less support for LGBTQ and the reach of the community lessening. Upvoting posts about corporate greed when it comes to pride is working against the cause. What do you want the corporations to do to show their authenticity ? If the CEOs came down in a rainbow speedo, you’d still shame them for being capitalistic and doing it for the money. The fact is, capitalism is America and we should take advantage of it especially when finally it’s appearing to voice the right opinions. Sure you can express your hate for capitalism but in this case, it’s analogous to if it were raining money and you were upset at the weather.


Altiondsols

you’re acting like corporations are literally only capable of changing their social media profile pictures and nothing else. how about they: - stop donating money to anti-gay politicians (which many do) - cover HRT/GRS and prep/truvada with their employee health insurance plans - threaten to pull out of cities with transphobic bathroom bills (which *has* worked in the past) and other anti-LGBT laws - take that same energy to the rest of the world, stop operating in countries where being LGBT is illegal (or at least the ones where they’re murdering us, maybe) - enforce internal anti-discrimination policies beyond the absolute bare minimum required by law - donate any amount of money to lgbt charities, shelters, advocacy groups this is just like, off the top of my head. if i had a few billion dollars to throw around, i could hire someone to come up with actually substantive ways to support LGBT people


nanowrimoboi

the thing is they aren't going to do that. Activism capitalism isn't anything new, and corporations almost never act according to personal beliefs. The fact that the marketing campaign that'll make them the most money or get them the most positive feedback is a changed profile picture or a pride-based marketing campaign is what's a big step.


Altiondsols

none of these are like, unrealistic pie-in-the-sky requests. tons of companies already do these things, so it’s just incorrect to say it will never happen. if they’re just going to change their profile pictures because that’s the most effective marketing strategy, then that’s the part we need to change - ***stop*** giving corporations credit and money when all they’re giving us is lip service. we need to demand actual action and ignore useless pandering from organizations with anti-LGBT practices.


nanowrimoboi

I don't believe it'll never happen, but it's unlikely as of right now because it isn't going to make them the most money and there aren't nearly enough people actively against it. I don't agree with the idea of using activism for capitalism but I also think it's important to acknowledge that what large corporations 'support' plays an active part in creating cognitive dissonance among bigots and creating an environment where supporting/being LGBT+ is casual and normalized. It's not perfect, but it's a step forward.


ImagineMSI

Homosexuality isn’t transphobic On Imgur was a comment convo basically a lesbian stated she wasn’t attracted to a penis so wouldn’t date/have sex with someone who was MtF; (because a penis is a Hard No). Not only was she accused of being transphobic, it was also suggested she should try a penis because maybe she doesn’t really dislike them. I disagreed. No matter, if while in transition, one wants to call their reproductive organs the opposite of what they were born with, doesn’t obligate anyone to consider them as such and is super creepy to “talk them into it”. Which led to an in-person discussion about a widowed gay Uncle. He wouldn’t ever date or have relations with a women (including FtM). Again; this was called transphobic. I disagreed. Same thing; he has never nor will ever be attracted to women so how he gonna be called transphobic (Especially considering the whole he wasn’t allowed to openly live with and marry his partner). Surely, I thought, this is silly and not the popular opinion. So made a post; immediately taken down. Tried again and same. 3rd time not the charm. This is leading me to fear the popular opinion is that same-sex is considered transphobic.


bluefishegg

>On Imgur was a comment convo basically a lesbian stated she wasn’t attracted to a penis so wouldn’t date/have sex with someone who was MtF; Genital preferences are a completely valid reason to not want to date a trans person. >it was also suggested she should try a penis because maybe she doesn’t really dislike them That's horrible, no one should be shamed for their genital preferences. >No matter, if while in transition, one wants to call their reproductive organs the opposite of what they were born with What do you mean by while in transition? Pre genital surgery? Or are you counting the genital as the same after surgery? (sorry I'm unsure about your meaning) >doesn’t obligate anyone to consider them as such and is super creepy to “talk them into it”. Yeah, trying to talk anyone into sex is creepy and predatory All that being said, I'll take your word for the conversation going like that. That being said, I've seen people claim this kind of thing happened, but when looked into it it's been a totally different situation and your post with the screenshot seems to have been removed. Having genital preferences is not transphobic, not wanting to date someone only because they're trans (regardless of genitals) is. >He wouldn’t ever date or have relations with a women (including FtM). Trans men aren't women, stating so is transphobic. >Again; this was called transphobic Who called it that in your in-person conversation? >he has never nor will ever be attracted to women so how he gonna be called transphobic Again, calling a trans man a woman is transphobic >So made a post; immediately taken down. Tried again and same. 3rd time not the charm. At least two of em I'd assume were taken down because you called trans men women. The r/unpopularopinion is because the sub is flooded with lgbt opinions, which is why the megathread exists. The one with the screenshot, I can't tell because I can't see the screenshot >This is leading me to fear the popular opinion is that same-sex is considered transphobic Being gay or lesbian isn't transphobic. To reiterate, having genital preferences is not transphobic, not wanting to date someone only because they're trans (regardless of genitals) is


ImagineMSI

You say it’s transphobic to not want to date or have sexual relations with a trans person bc they are trans. I’d rather be transphobic than force people to feel They have to be attracted or feel they Have to date someone they aren’t attracted to nor want to date. If someone isn’t attracted to trans people; that that. End of convo. Period. The End. To try to convince Anyone they Have to be open to a certain group for dating and sex is Coercion and Immoral.


bluefishegg

>You say it’s transphobic to not want to date or have sexual relations with a trans person bc they are trans. If the only reason (no genital issues, no social miss match, they're totally into them otherwise) is that they're trans, that is transphobic. Don't try to simplify what I said to make it seem like I said something I didn't.. >I’d rather be transphobic than force people to feel They have to be attracted or feel they Have to date someone they aren’t attracted to nor want to date. I'd also never want to force someone into a relationship, as I stated above, I find that abhorrent.. >If someone isn’t attracted to a trans people; that that. > >End of convo. Period. The End. I agree and I wouldn't want to date them either >To try to convince Anyone they Have to be open to a certain group for dating and sex is Coercion and Immoral. I have not tried to convince anyone to date anyone.. If someone doesn't want to date me, I sure as hell don't want to date them


ImagineMSI

I don’t know how to do those lines But you said not wanting to date someone because they trans is transphobic That’s why I responded with can’t force people into it. I see you even presented excuses - no genital issue (which omg that the whole point of being homosexual is only being attracted to 1 genital) I don’t know what social mismatch means. There can be reasons or None at all - Simply not into trans and that is fine - no excuses needed - no name calling, no shaming , And most Important no trying to convince someone


bluefishegg

Are you just trying to look for a fight..? Because I wasn't trying to give you one... I was just simply explaining.. And you are really misreading what I'm saying here.. >I don’t know how to do those lines You can do them by adding a '>' symbol in front of the line you are quoting >I see you even presented excuses They're not excuses, they're examples that if otherwise would be valid reasons for not wanting to date a trans person... >no genital issue Meaning no problem with the trans person's genitals or the trans person has compatible genitals (like after surgery) >which omg that the whole point of being homosexual is only being attracted to 1 genital That's not true, many people are gay, lesbian or straight and are more interested in the general aesthetic of whoever they're attracted to than their genitals. Gay men who are into trans men are still gay, lesbians who are into trans women are still lesbians, straight people who are into trans people are still straight.. Don't try to redefine someone else's sexuality >I don’t know what social mismatch means. I meant as in socially compatible, get along, etc >There can be reasons or None at all - Simply not into trans and that is fine - no excuses needed - no name calling, no shaming Yes and it's absolutely fine to date or exclude anyone for any reason.. However, doing it only because they're trans is transphobic because it implies that the trans person isn't the gender they are, which is transphobic.. Would you also argue as hard that not wanting to date black people only because they're black isn't racist? >And most Important no trying to convince someone Again, stop claiming that I am trying to convince anyone to date anyone!!! For fuck sake, people should be free to date who ever the fuck they want, stop claiming that I've ever said otherwise...


ImagineMSI

I have more time later And want to try < For this moment though I will quickly try another perspective and this is my own. I only see women gynecologist. I won’t see a trans gynecologist. And that is my Right I don’t have to be shamed, forced, or name called or try to be convinced or coerced into seeing a gyno that is a man or a trans.


bluefishegg

>I only see women gynecologist. > >I won’t see a trans gynecologist. Yes, that is your right, I have never stated otherwise..! Though I don't see how that would come up or how you'd necessarily know >I don’t have to be shamed, forced, or name called or try to be convinced or coerced into seeing a gyno that is a man or a trans I have never shamed you, forced you or tried to convince you! I am describing the thought of describing trans people as a gender they're not as transphobic.. Because it is, you are denying people's true identity and who they are As you said you will wear the badge with pride.. Though seriously, what's with this victim complex..? People have transphobic thoughts sure, that doesn't mean that its all they are..


ImagineMSI

https://imgur.com/gallery/BqCcH39


bluefishegg

Yup, that person is definitely not respecting her genital preferences and is being a creep. Could you address some of the other things I said? I'm curious about your opinions and unsure on some stuff you said


SouthernYoghurt9

Assuming all MTFs have a penis is transphobic Calling FTMs "women" is transphobic


ImagineMSI

You missed the point - the Rape-y part - the absolute horridness of defending yourself again and again that can’t be forced to be attracted to something your Not.


ImagineMSI

After this whole experience; Guess I’m transphobic 🤷🏻‍♀️


SouthernYoghurt9

Probably a little bit


ImagineMSI

https://imgur.com/gallery/BqCcH39


ImagineMSI

If no one cares that a lesbian was made to defend herself then Thankfully Yes


gaycheesecake

Why do you seem like.....happy about that?


ImagineMSI

https://imgur.com/gallery/BqCcH39


ImagineMSI

It just happened Literally I woke up; read comments from one of the few posts that were stayed up; and I’ve decided I’d rather be labeled and considered transphobic


ohay_nicole

Counting a trans man as a woman is transphobic, though.


ImagineMSI

After this whole experience; Guess I’m transphobic 🤷🏻‍♀️


Kongo204

You're the one that started this. If you wanna give up on the discussion you started without a single good faith reply, that's on you. But it's weak as hell.


ImagineMSI

https://imgur.com/gallery/BqCcH39


Kongo204

Wait, all this is over someone asking too many, maybe somewhat invasive or leading, questions about someone's reasoning?


ImagineMSI

Asking a lesbian to consider a penis isn’t asking questions And it’s a hell of a lot more than invasive


Kongo204

That's not true, though. There are plenty of lesbians in relationships with women who have penises.


ImagineMSI

Your flippant attitude towards predatory comments says everything I am fine with being transphobic now.


Kongo204

Why are you fine with being a bigot? Shit you're defensive. I never even called you a transphobes.


ImagineMSI

So your defending that someone can question their sexuality and try to persuade them otherwise??


ImagineMSI

What I brought up was the fact that a lesbian had to defend herself against why she not sucking dick What I brought up is not forcing a gay man to consider dating outside his sexuality And what happened - oh you used a term wrong or called this that so really that’s the only important thing Everything else is acceptable and good


ImagineMSI

The fact is no one is discussing it No one is actually discussing that you can’t convince someone to find your anatomy sexually attractive no matter is trans or not Everyone is jumping on labels and how that’s awful and transphobic Yet no one is batting an eye on the real issue


Kongo204

You suggest something isn't transphobic, and people follow up with what they think is transphobic. Give your reasoning why you think people are wrong. That's how this works. As people have brought up, trans people's anatomy isn't always what they were born with.


ImagineMSI

A lesbian was accused of transphobic simply for being gay He tried to convince her that she may like a penis When I say this is wrong and she isn’t transphobic; just as an uncle isnt for being gay isn’t either Bans, Censor and Now you and we’ll none of that matters ahaha


Kongo204

I'm confused, was the person with the penis a cis man or a trans woman? And you know there are gay cis men dating trans men and cis lesbians dating trans women, right?


ImagineMSI

Read for yourself I wish now in hindsight I would have screenshots all of it. This asshole doubled down like he was trump on why he was right and she was wrong https://i.imgur.com/xnXBDfw.jpg I figure out how to do it


ImagineMSI

Nope not playing label games anymore - Since being titled transphobic am just embracing it. A lesbian can’t have a penis because lesbians are women. A man talked down to her, calling her transphobic, because a penis can be female too and should be open to it. (He called himself trans lesbian) That a crossed line and if I’m downvoted to oblivion or banned from every subreddits for saying it then that better than remaining silent and stand by while This kind of abuse is apparently not only being normalized but encouraged


ImagineMSI

And you do know that for many more gay is gay and that is that Why should they get push back & be named called for not dating outside their sex - This On Top of having to deal with homophobia


Kongo204

As I said earlier, if the only reason not to date a trans person of the gender you're attracted to (as in, they're physically attractive, have the genitals you're interested in, etc.) is that they're trans, that's transphobic.


ImagineMSI

How did I not already


ImagineMSI

I was up til 3am discussing ....


ohay_nicole

If that was intentional on your part, then very much yes. Otherwise, I do my best to not assume too much from one ambiguous comment.


ImagineMSI

Not my intent at all; I’m Not republican I don’t care about bathrooms/I’m anti bathroom bills After reading what I considered predatory and rape-y comments on Imgur; I took it to Reddit. Censored at every turn as if No One can discuss anything trans related without immediately being called names & threatened. The worst was No One caring that a lesbian was being told by a man (I don’t care anymore) that hey can’t say no to a penis because she may like it and hey my penis is female as if that made it ok. The rabbit hole led me to realize I’m going to proudly carry the label “transphobic “


bluefishegg

>I don’t care about bathrooms/I’m anti bathroom bills You just posted an article to r/feminism which seems to heavily agree with them


ImagineMSI

I did just post that; after finding it late last night/early morning It actually was eye opening and changed my perspective. As I recall it didn’t talk about bathrooms but about prisons and hostels etc No mention of bathroom though


bluefishegg

Woman-only spaces includes bathrooms, specially to Kathleen Stock. She's a prolific anti trans activist


ImagineMSI

So? I’ll look her up and make my own decisions thank you


bluefishegg

>So? It includes bathrooms, that's all For gendered spaces such as bathrooms, hostels and changing rooms, there is absolutely [no evidence of a trend of trans women perpetrating any large scale violence (sexual or otherwise)](https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s13178-018-0335-z). While there is evidence [transgender and gender-nonbinary teens face greater risk of sexual assault in schools that prevent them from using bathrooms or locker rooms consistent with their gender identity. With 36% of teenaged transgender or gender-nonbinary students (US) with restricted bathroom or locker room access reported being sexually assaulted in the last 12 months (2018-2019)](https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/news/hsph-in-the-news/transgender-teens-restricted-bathroom-access-sexual-assault/) [Evidence shows](https://www.lambdalegal.org/know-your-rights/article/trans-restroom-faq) that [allowing trans people into the bathrooms](https://www.cnn.com/2017/03/07/health/transgender-bathroom-law-facts-myths/index.html) and other spaces which [conform with their gender](https://www.vox.com/identities/2016/5/13/17938102/transgender-people-bathrooms-locker-rooms-schools) poses no [additional risk to anyone](https://www.politifact.com/factchecks/2016/apr/01/chris-sgro/equality-nc-director-no-public-safety-risks-cities/). >I’ll look her up and make my own decisions thank you That is very much your right, just have in mind that she has a tendency to misrepresent data to suit her agenda [Btw, here's who's behind most of the bathroom bills in the US](https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/law-firm-linked-anti-transgender-bathroom-bills-across-country-n741106)


ohay_nicole

Sounds pretty intentional now. Weird flex about ignoring a subreddit’s rules being considered censorship to you, but ok.


ImagineMSI

And this why am going to proudly carry the transphobic label A woman was being told that even though she states she isn’t nor ever will be attracted to a penis; yet is being mansplained about how she might actually like his penis because he’s a lesbian too and she only dislikes penis because of society blah blah That’s coercion, that’s wrong, it’s Rape-y. Then it kept being bad; people were saying my uncle would be transphobic for not dating a female (again don’t care anymore; be mad and offended, you were only going to be anyway)


ohay_nicole

It sounds like you’re really trying to be mad about your own missteps on Reddit, but ok.


ImagineMSI

You placing labels ahead of people


ImagineMSI

No I’m mad that you aren’t upset that (again) a lesbian had to defend herself as to why she doesn’t have to date/have relations with a penis ergo a trans lesbian I’m upset that my uncle, a proud gay man, has to be shamed (after a lifetime of it just for being gay) simply because he’s ..... Gay!


ohay_nicole

What were you hoping I’d respond with? “Oh yeah, everyone like me is a terrible person because of bad takes on an Instagram post relayed secondhand to me on a Reddit post where bad faith is the norm?” Something else? Just trying to understand your expectations here.


DiplomaticRogue

Having a preference isn't transphobic so I agree with that, but please don't assume what genitals a trans person has.


Kongo204

Trans people might not always have the genitals you assume they do. It is not transphobic to not want to date anyone with a particular set of genitals. It is transphobic to rule out the possibility of ever being attracted to a trans person.


Adam060504

Assuming pronouns from name is completely fine, once you know the pronouns, respect them. “Hey so I was talking to Katie the other day...” “Who’s she?” “Oh no, it’s they” “Ok. What were you doing with them?” Please not “Hey so I was talking to Katie the other day...” “Who’s she?” *“Omg wtf how can you just assume their gender I mean come on do you have any respect get it right!!”*


EternalLatias

I'm not going to call someone "they". You can't control what I say.


a_rat_22

Hi non binary person here who uses they/them pronouns, please respect peoples pronouns thank you


[deleted]

[удалено]


a_rat_22

I hope you can get the help you need you absolute fucking boomer, I don't identify with any gender and use they/them, what's so hard to understand?


[deleted]

[удалено]


a_rat_22

You make no sense either. I don't need a therpist because I'm non binary Jesus fucking christ


VedDdlAXE

Aw that's so thoughtful of you. I'm sure they will get help and people like you will finally fuck off so they can use the pronouns they want without being treated like shit. What a world that'll be :)


[deleted]

[удалено]


VedDdlAXE

"I hope you can get the help you need" If you didn't mean that in an offensive way I think you need to re-evaluate how you word your replies


[deleted]

[удалено]


VedDdlAXE

Lmfao so you think that's okay to say? Just say them if you don't even know their sex. That's not even an LGBTQ thing. You're trying soooo hard to intelligently weazel out of this but you don't actually have a clue.


Simply_Sky

It's way better than calling someone "it".


EternalLatias

It's very clear who is a man and who is a woman. You can't fool me. I obviously wouldn't call them "it".


VedDdlAXE

>them


theowawayhs

> wouldn't call *them* "it".


JustAGamer14

r/selfawarewolves


Anonymous___2020___

Now this intentional misgender, that I believe!


Sablemint

Ive never seen someone get upset about it. Your first example is what always happens. Nobody expects you to know before hand.


Kongo204

Who gets upset about this?


ohay_nicole

Do I just not run in the kind of circles where this happens unprompted? Or is this much ado about nothing?


Sablemint

It never actually happens like this.


theowawayhs

you do not


[deleted]

Nobody here is gonna disagree with you dude. Accidental misgendering isn't a problem, and being LGBTQ+ doesn't mean you can't be toxic AF.


Revontulet-117

Notice to the moderators of this subreddit: the LGBTQ+ community is NOT a minority. Check your facts before you pander to the toxics. My deleted post: **If you're so proud to be LGBTQ+, you don't need a whole month proclaiming it to the world.** It comes off as attention grabby, promoting nothing but corporate marketing and enables the toxic members of the associated group to find an excuse to say all kinds of extreme, unfounded things, getting away with it because if anybody speaks out against them during "pride month", they'll be shunned by millions. I'm bisexual myself, and most of the people I know are as well. None of us, and none of the others we know, participate in this "pride month". We're not "proud" of our bisexuality no more than a typical straight person that isn't an egomaniac is "proud" of being straight. What we're "proud" of is that we live our lives the way we choose to live them, not letting corporate propaganda determine when we're allowed to feel good about the choices we make.


SomeLakitu

Do you know what minority means


VedDdlAXE

Your post? On the main sub? Where LGBTQ posts are deleted by a bot automatically and you are LITERALLY TOLD to use this megathread? Or do you mean here? Where there is a sticky at the top of the mega-thread telling you how fucking repetitive and boring your fucking opinion is and so you should join a thread of someone ELSES comment on the matter.


SouthernYoghurt9

Bi people certainly make up a majority, but how many of them consider themselves straight to get cishet priviledge?


chekeymonk10

Get rid of black history month then. Are you proud to have cancer? Ditch that month too. What about fighting in the army? Bye bye September


Altiondsols

lgbt people are by definition a minority. substantially fewer than 50% of people are lgbt. it’s nice that you don’t feel that you personally need pride month, and i agree that it is unfortunate that so many groups take advantage of pride. but to a lot of lgbt people in different living situations, pride is the counter to the rest of the world telling them that they should be ashamed for who they are. if you don’t feel the need to celebrate, connect with other people who experience the same struggles as you do, ignore the homophobia/transphobia of the rest of the world for a short while, that’s totally fine! no one is forcing you to go, but you don’t need to ruin it for everyone else. it might help to look into the history of pride and how it started to understand why a lot of the community has such strong feelings about it. it wasn’t always a rainbow capitalism festival with police floats and entry fees.


Revontulet-117

The corporate greed and extremely vocal social media users that use the month as an excuse to be heterophobic are what's ruining the label for people, not someone saying the month isn't necessary. There are plenty of other ways to support communities that struggle throughout the world than an exploitable holiday that ultimately only gets used to sell more stuff. Attend rallies. Offer financial support to construct clubs where members of that community can gather without judgement. Run your *own* club, even. Where there's a will, there's a way. If you're proud to be LGBTQ, then fight for it in a way where your voice will actually be heard.


Altiondsols

do you do any of those things?


Revontulet-117

I do all three in my local community, which is a small town in Northern Russia. A country *renowned* for it's anti-LGBTQ opinions.


Anonymous___2020___

How do I not you're not just going on the internet and telling lies?


[deleted]

> the LGBTQ+ community is NOT a minority. Citation needed, because holy FUCK, that is the dumbest thing I have ever seen posted in this thread.


Revontulet-117

I take it you didn't read any of the other comments posted by homophobes and bigots then. You really are an amazing display of toxic vocalism.


[deleted]

>You really are an amazing display of toxic vocalism. r/SelfAwarewolves Sitting here calling others toxic when the only response you have to ANY argument in this thread is "You're a homophobe!"


Revontulet-117

When everything other than "completely straight" is considered part of the "pride spectrum", it very quickly stops being a minority.


[deleted]

Look, I'm sorry that you hate yourself for being bi, but that doesn't mean you have to shit on the people who don't.


Revontulet-117

Oh great, somebody that either is incapable of reading or is a homophobe. This particular comment thread isn't for you. Move along.


[deleted]

Lol. Go fuck yourself. I'm pan, I'm trans, and I'm not going to stop celebrating my identity just because it makes you or anybody else uncomfortable. I don't care if companies us it to pander. I don't care if you feel better suppressing your identity for the comfort of your homophobic government. I refuse.


Revontulet-117

Again, learn how to read properly, or get out of the comment thread. **The literal ending point of my post is that I am proud of my choices to live my life like anyone else while still being bi. I don't need corporate approval to tell me to be proud of who I am as a person.**


[deleted]

AND PRIDE IS NOT ABOUT CORPORATE APPROVAL It's about getting our rights. Equal. FUCKING. Rights. If you're not willing to fight for that, get out of the way.


Revontulet-117

You're clearly delusional and/or one of those toxic social media activists. The entirety of my point implies that I have the same exact rights as everyone else. Why would I not? I am just another person. Being bi does not mean I am no longer a person. I also do not go around acting like I am better than others because I am bi like you seem to do for your own sexuality. It's not a weapon. Don't use it like one.


Anonymous___2020___

Some people have less rights because of factors outside their control. Did you not know that?


[deleted]

You're not even allowed to get married, what the FUCK makes you think you have the same rights as straight people in your country? You HAVE to be fucking trolling.


Kongo204

More than 50% of people identify as straight.


Revontulet-117

And how many of those aren't actually covered under the LGBTQ spectrum and only choose straight on forms because there's no other option or they feel like they'd be targeted?


Altiondsols

IIRC, the best estimates for specifically gen-Z Americans is that something like 16% of them are LGBT. I think it’s correct to predict that gen-Z Americans aren’t actually more likely to be LGBT, they’re just less repressed than the rest of the world and therefore more likely to outwardly identify as LGBT. But even then, if LGBT people aren’t a minority, you’re still saying that less than a third of LGBT gen-Z Americans are comfortable/self-aware enough to self-identify on an anonymous survey, which seems like a stretch.


Revontulet-117

America isn't the entire world. While it has it's share of repression, it's still a lot more open minded than a lot of other countries, particularly those on the Asian continent.


Altiondsols

Yeah, I agree with that. I’m being generous to your position (that the majority of people are LGBT) by extrapolating gen-Z Americans to the rest of the world, when that demographic has a disproportionately high number of LGBT people. But, even when you do that, it’s still really unlikely that LGBT people are the majority. You’d still need more than triple that number to reach an actual majority, which means saying that there is a huge number of LGBT gen-Z Americans who are too repressed to identify as LGBT on an anonymous survey - the part that seems dubious.


Revontulet-117

There are at least 71 countries where homosexuality is flat-out illegal. Add those to the hundred plus more where being gay will get you beat down in the streets while everyone just watches.


Altiondsols

I’m lost. Yes, I agree that there are a lot of countries where it isn’t safe to come out - which is why I’m not using any of them in my estimate. I’m only looking at the demographic section with the highest percentage of LGBT people (gen-Z Americans), and even in that group, it’s still far from a majority. I’m making generous assumptions in *your* favor, and I’m still not able to come to your conclusion. Do you understand what I’m saying?


[deleted]

And yet somehow you think gay people have equal rights.


Kongo204

I'd guess the vast majority of them are actually cis/het. Unless you have some evidence that the majority of humans are in the closet?